


the one where leorio gets some character development

by babblesmarie



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Blood, Dark Continent Arc (Hunter X Hunter), Gen, M/M, Nightmares, POV Multiple, Post-Chairman Election Arc, Slow Burn, am i making assumptions of characters based on 2 lines of dialogue? yeah, but this boy also needs to train his nen like now, leorio centric, leorio shows up 15 minutes early to a zodiac meeting with iced coffee, okay so leorio is still a zodiac and med student, the slowest burn, tw for hisoka's existence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:54:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 37,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28198716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babblesmarie/pseuds/babblesmarie
Summary: Leorio's life has become increasingly hectic since he met Gon Freecs. With his friends scattered across the world Leorio dedicates himself to his medical training, his duties as a Zodiac, and the immense world of Nen. As he and the other Zodiacs prepare for the voyage to the Dark Continent, he finds some information that might be of use to one of his friends.The only problem is that it's been nearly two years since Leorio has seen or heard from Kurapika.
Relationships: Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Comments: 31
Kudos: 62





	1. New Zodiacs, Old Friends

**Author's Note:**

> hey y'all. long story short, I have about 20k words written, largely unedited. I didn't wanna post until I was done, but a little peer encouragement goes a long way, so I said fuck it. the plan is for this to span to the end of the succession arc, most of which I will be taking creative liberties with for obvious reasons.

  
  


**_i think i'll pace my apartment a few times_ **

**_and fall asleep on the couch_ **

  
  


Leorio Paladiknight scraped by in life with a little cunning, desire, and undeniable luck. He lost a dear friend, won a few gambles, and passed the Hunter Exam--in which he made new, slightly hairbrained friends. Now those friends spread to the corners of the world and Leorio dedicated himself to his medical studies and honing his nen under the one and only Chairman of the Hunter Association, Cheadle Yorkshire.

In the months since Cheadle had been elected by default, she inducted Leorio into the Zodiacs, a group of high ranking Hunters that worked under the authority of the chairman. Leorio himself had been in the running for the title of Chairman, despite only passing the hunter Exam less than a year prior. Cheadle, had not only recently taken the mantle of chairman, but had taken a chance on a green Hunter and medical student.

Leorio kept a busy schedule in the year since the election. He barely reached the subway--dressed in his favored suit for once--when he received the heads up to turn back around to the Zodiac HQ. Today had been his “day off” yet he had to attend an eight hour meeting that he just left. Leorio tapped at his phone in response before sighing and turning on his heel. He had foolishly hoped for a boiling shower.

_Group: Z_

**_DOG_ ** _18:33_

_Urgent, need everyone back at HQ ASAP, Ox is back with crucial intel on BW._

**_DOG_ ** _18:34_

_I'll buy dinner._

  
  


**_BOAR_ ** _18:34_

_I need smth deep fried for this atrocity!! I’ll bring caffeine._

Since being recruited as a Zodiac, Leorio’s free time dwindled down to nothing. Cheadle had warned him that he wouldn’t have it easy. He had to contribute to the new Hunter Exam, which in and of itself proved to be challenging. Though he threw many ideas out there, only a handful had even been considered. This year, the Hunter Exam doubled as a reconnaissance mission for the upcoming voyage.

It seemed like a daunting task, but Leorio’s pure, unadulterated _want_ drove him his entire life. From his days as a poor street kid, the _want_ of food or a warm bed bolstered his resilience. On those nights when he fell asleep curled into a potato sack, his dreams of all the things he could grow up to have kept him warm through the night. 

Then there was the time when Pietro got sick, Leorio _wanted_ to help, to pay for the medical intervention that his friend needed. Leorio scrambled together every bit of money he could, the image of a future with Pietro still in it filled his stomach as he stubbornly clutched his coin purse. 

And when he couldn't save Pietro--couldn't save enough money to save Pietro--he _wanted_ to go back to finish medical school, he _wanted_ to learn how to save people. 

When Leorio had nearly been elected _fucking Chairman,_ that same _want_ panged in his chest, not to _be_ Chairman, but to be somebody worthy to have stood up there amongst elite hunters.

So when Cheadle asked him to join the Zodiacs, to study vigorously under her, Leorio's _want_ ached like acid blooming deep in his chest. He wanted to bet his life on something so Gon and Killua--two of his new friends who had risked everything to save the world a year ago--could take a break the next time the world fell to epic shit.

So, Leorio wanted a shower, sure, but he wanted something more still. Which is why he didn’t hesitate in turning right around and still arrived before most of the other members despite his coffee detour. Beside Cheadle, and the intel team, he was the only one there. 

Cheadle, a short woman with an upturned nose and fluffy, green hair looked apologetic as Leorio approached, but happily traded various breads for her iced coffee.

“Did we find anything cool, Mizai?” Leorio asked, biting into a fried bread to find spiced chicken and vegetables. Even if Cheadle borderline tortured him with his schedule, she always knew the _best_ places to get food.

Mizaistom, the tall and stoic head of the intelligence team, represented the Ox Zodiac. He took his own coffee and drank from it generously before answering. “We’ll wait until everyone gets here before going into too much detail, but we’ve confirmed some details about key passengers on the voyage.” 

Leorio nodded, his mouth too full to answer verbally. The voyage as Leorio understood it, had something to do with the previous chairman’s crazy son, the Kakin Empire, and the V5 fighting about a cruise to hell. His job on said hell-voyage would be to work under Cheadle as a medical student, and as a Zodiac.

_Maybe I’ll be someone they can rely on, when this is all over,_ Leorio thought, despite the small margin of success the voyage provided.

The rest of the Zodiacs arrived one by one until the table became crowded with people and food. The seat across from Leorio remained empty, a seat that presumably had been the former Vice-Chairman’s. According to Cheadle, he resigned from the Zodiacs along with Leorio’s predecessor, Ging Freecs--the father of Gon and an insufferable bastard.

Gel, the Snake Zodiac, helped make up the rest of the medical unit along with Leorio and Cheadle. She sat to his left in a thin black dress that flattered her and left a blush on Leorio's cheeks.

"Come here often?" Gel asked with a sardonic smile.

Leorio tore a chunk out of a different bread, this one filled with fruit and cream. Around his mouthful of food he mumbled what was supposed to be, “My life feels like one long meeting.”

It was then that Cheadle cleared her throat to gain everyone’s attention and started the meeting with Mizai at her side. 

“Sorry to call for everyone back in such a hurry, but I’d rather we all get this information as soon as possible." Cheadle looked around the table, features serious. "There will be challenges during the voyage, and knowing about the other passengers is key in order to ensure our success in overcoming these challenges. Once on the Black Whale we will be in a bloody, territorial, sibling rivalry.” 

Cheadle turned the meeting over to Mizai, who passed out folders to everyone at the table. “We know that the fourteen Princes of Kakin will be travelling aboard the Black Whale. Some of these Princes have notorious reputations, with penchants for violence.”

Inside the folders were photographs of the princes. There was also a sheet with a short written paragraph on Kakin’s bloody history.

“One of the princes in particular, Tserriednich, has a gruesome body collection. It is also worth mentioning that some of the younger princes are mere children.”

The bread soured in Leorio’s mouth and he thought to himself that maybe he should consider not eating at meetings. He held up a finger as he swallowed. “When you say _body collection_ do you mean, actual bodies or like, body _parts_?”

Leorio could feel the stares of his fellow Zodiacs. Somewhere down the table the Tiger Zodiac, Kanzai snorted. Leorio’s eye twitched but he remained focused on Mizai.

“Anything that piques his interest, usually something rare, inherited features or unnatural disfigurations. Some he’s ‘cultivated’ himself. Things like that, why do you ask?”

Maybe he _could_ do something useful. “Uh, no reason. Go on.” 

**_Leorio_** **_19:23_**

_Mizai, I need to ask you some questions privately_

Leorio didn’t receive a response to his text and turned his attention back on the folder in front of him. Fourteen princes were going to be duking it out to the death on the ship. If they were all monsters like Tserriendich Leorio might have said let them have at it. That thought was short-lived as he faced the youngest princes’ photos. Three princes were seemingly Gon and Killua’s age and younger, the youngest being a literal infant.

Surely _they_ weren’t monsters. Surely the succession contest didn’t include _them_. Again, Leorio’s hopes dashed as he listened to the conclusion of Mizai's report. Cheadle had taken control of the meeting again when Leorio’s pocket buzzed with a notification.

**_Mizai 19:40_ **

_About the body collector prince?_

**_Leorio 19:41_ **

_Yes, but let’s keep the questions and answers between us, okay? I plan to talk to Cheadle as well, but no one else needs to know._

Leorio tried to be low-key about his texting, using only one hand and still watching the room around him. He could feel someone’s eyes on him when everyone else had already turned away. Leorio tried to avoid looking around or looking at Mizai, but he managed to see that Mizai seemed to be entirely focused on Cheadle’s presentation.

**_Mizai 19:45_ **

_Shoot. Unless you want to talk after?_

**_Mizai 19:46_ **

_Also you aren’t subtle at all._

**_Leorio 19:48_ **

_I’m aware. Can’t after, trying to actually sleep tonight._

**_Leorio 19:49_ **

_This prince, do we know any specifics about his collection?_

**_Mizai 19:49_ **

_Such as?_

Leorio bit his lip. He thought of why he knew about things like body collectors, of why he cared. He worried he might say something to endanger his third new, hairbrained friend; wherever the fuck he was.

**_Leorio 19:53_ **

_Scarlet Eyes?_

Leorio didn't know what he would say, if Kurapika ever spoke to him again. Over the year and a half that passed, Leorio had wondered about such a scenario. It had been so long since he had received a text or call back from the blond, but Leorio's _want_ never wavered in the silence. He had endured worse than a cold shoulder.

The calls to Kurapika had begun as a weekly thing, with texts whenever Leorio thought he was being funny or had accomplished something.

The calls and texts had tapered to a less frequent thing after the election, but they had never stopped completely. It simply took a lot more for Leorio to break down enough to try. Although information on the prince would be a huge thing to reach out about, Kurapika could take the information and disappear again. Or maybe Leorio would just be telling Kurapika something he already knew and getting his hopes up about a new lead.

**_Mizai 20:01_ **

_As a matter of fact, yes. That wasn’t included in the report, how do you know?_

**_Leorio 20:02_ **

_Oh wow, I didn’t actually expect that. A guy I know is tracking them down, I’m thinking he might help us if we help him._

Leorio pondered on the information regarding the Scarlet Eyes for the rest of the meeting. He thought back to the flashes he had seen, in the last living person to see through those eyes. Leorio thought of how nasty a person had to be to collect body parts, and of what Kurapika might have to do to get to someone like that.

Cheadle didn’t release the meeting until almost ten, at which point all questions had been answered over and over again for Kanzai’s sake and the members began to grouch at each other more than earlier. 

Leorio excused himself from the table. He dialed Kurapika’s number, disappointment stacking in his gut with every ring.

Leorio had once hoped that Kurapika might instinctively know when he called with something important, but when he never answered or called back while Gon was in the hospital, Leorio gave that up.

The call went to voicemail, but the mailbox was full. Leorio had already come to the conclusion that Kurapika hadn’t listened to them, or even deleted them. Leorio regretted the drunken voicemails he left last year in a fit of loneliness and he regretted the selfish ones he left right before Gon got hurt. Maybe if Kurapika would have listened to any of them at all, it would have been the ones about Gon, and maybe he would have called back.

**_Leorio 22:02_ **

_Call me back._

Leorio thought about leaving more details, but his back ached and he wanted a shower enough to still take one when he got home. He sighed, still needing to talk to Cheadle before he could leave. He caught her attention by sulking back to the table.

“Can I ask for a favor?” he asked.

“If you’re here for a day off the answer is no. You know what you signed up for.”

Cheadle could be quite vicious, but she told Leorio when she invited him to the Zodiacs that she thought he could do great things, and that she meant it when she said she would mentor him if he was elected chairman. If not for former Vice-Chairman Pariston’s last minute stalling, he would have, in her mind.

Someone actually believed in him, and Leorio didn’t want to let her down, so he didn't argue much.

“Very funny.” Leorio scratched the back of his neck, wondering if this was even his place. If he should really do what he was about to do. “You haven’t found anyone to replace Pariston, right?”

Cheadle hummed. Her green bangs fell across her eyes and she had to look up at Leorio through them. “No, not yet.”

Leorio sucked in a breath. He had to take chances. “Well, ideally shouldn’t we have a full team before heading on the voyage?”

Cheadle crossed her arms. “I suppose that’s true, but I don’t have the time to vet interviewees.”

“Maybe I can save you the trouble. I’ll text you the details and you can let me know if you’re interested, but I gotta head home for a while.”

Cheadle nodded, though she raised an eyebrow. Leorio was lucky she trusted him enough to give him a chance.“Bright and early in the morning!”

Leorio waved as he walked away, nodding in appreciation to Mizai before he left.

The subway ride stiffened Leorio's muscles and his cold apartment didn't help at all. It didn’t have much of a homey feeling to it, but nowhere he’d lived had ever given him that feeling. He had been moving around, partly because that’s all he has really known. He never stayed anywhere permanently in med school, not even the dorms. But this apartment was a boon from the Hunter Association. Fully furnished and rarely appreciated. 

Leorio dropped his briefcase onto a small kitchen table and made his way to the bathroom in the hall to run the shower.

While the water heated to the desired insane temperature, Leorio stripped his clothes off throughout the apartment’s living space. He investigated the fridge to find a few beers stuck to the bottom and ripped one of them out. 

He twisted the top and tossed it into the sink. The apartment was nice, with a built in bookshelf and floor to ceiling window where Leorio had a desk. It was where he spent the most time in the apartment. Coincidentally one of the only things Leorio personally owned--besides a fuck load of medical books--was a small framed picture. It sat on a shelf which would be directly in Leorio’s eyesight if he sat in his desk chair and simply turned to the right.

Leorio took a swig of beer. His heart ached horribly when he looked at the picture some days. Some days he wished he could go back in time to when that picture was taken, knowing everything he knew now.

He checked his phone, to see no new messages. No calls.

**_Leorio 22:20_ **

_I’m tired, and I want to do this the easy way_.

Maybe Kurapika would be more responsive to a stranger, after all his initial politeness is all the room needed to extend the necessary information. Leorio took another drink.

**_Leorio 22:26_ **

_Mizai, I hate to ask another favor, but if I give you a name could you find someone?_

**_Mizai 22:28_ **

_Your friend that Cheadle is looking into recruiting? Possibly._

_Good,_ Leorio thought. Cheadle and Mizai were already on the same page and that alone eased Leorio’s pondering mind about where _his place_ was.

**_Leorio 22:29_ **

_Yes, I would owe you one big time. He’s not talking to me right now._

**_Mizai 22:31_ **

_And we’re still helping?_

**_Leorio 22:33_ **

_Of course, as much as I can._

**_Mizai 22:34_ **

_Send me the info_

The water in the shower became scalding, but it was what Leorio needed. He set his phone aside, determined to help Kurapika even when he didn’t want to be helped. He slinked into the shower and the water burned pleasantly against his muscles, aching from the constant tension of focusing his nen.

If he got out of the shower no later than eleven and had to wake up by four, to be ready to leave by four-thirty to get to the hospital by five; assuming he fell asleep quickly he’d get about four and a half hours of sleep.

Leorio scrubbed furiously, desperate to not think about his phone _not_ making noise. This is precisely why he didn’t text or call Kurapika anymore. 

The silence sucked.

Minty body wash swirled down the drain as Leorio reached for his shampoo. He quickly rinsed all of the soap off, eager to end the night now that his enjoyable shower had been compromised.

Leorio toweled off and collected his suit pieces to dump in the laundry. He deposited his folded glasses on the low coffee table in front of the futon in the living room. He had a perfectly good bed, but if he slept in there he might not wake up on time. He made sure to plug his phone in, thinking like the damn fool he was, _just in case_.

He huffed to himself, knowing it was a stupid thought. The moon cast a pale blue glow through the window. Leorio found himself looking at the shadows on the wall, focused intently on not indulging his thoughts until his heavy eyelids slid closed

**_but now that i’m broken,_ **

**_and now that you know it_ **

**_can you see inside?_ **

It had all been a wild goose chase.

Kurapika burned through his resolve not to lose control in the middle of the street.

It wouldn't do him any good to cause a scene.

Melody remained quiet beside him. She had become the only constant Kurapika allowed in his life. She knew where his boundaries were and rarely dared to push.

Unlike others, Melody could _hear_ his heart. She knew better than anyone else that he lived on nails and borrowed time.

Kurapika's feet splashed in the ditch as he pressed his phone to his face to call for Basho. 

Melody trailed behind, silent and clutching her hat down in the wind. Dead leaves rioted like tornadoes in the park across the street.

"Dead end, we're moving on. Pick us up at the place five minutes from now." Kurapika didn't wait for a reply before his phone disappeared in his pocket.

Kurapika raged with agitation and lingering, crushed hope. His grey contacts only barely hid away the bloody color of his irises.

A black car with dark tinted windows sped over the railroad tracks and halted in front of them, careful not to run into any puddles.

Kurapika flung the back door open, leaving it to jerk violently in the wind. Melody wiggled in and managed to shut the door before Basho spun the mud covered tires and reversed over the tracks.

Kurapika pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled. There were still eyes that were unaccounted for.

Ones that Kurapika couldn't locate.

The last ones.

Once back at the bar, Kurapika stalked to the back room where he permitted very few. The room was blocked off with heavy blue drapery and a reinforced metal door. He needed to be alone, needed to not feel like a failure, like everyone around him judged him for being a ticking time bomb.

_What have I missed?_

There were more leads, there were always leads, but there weren't a lot of eyes left. Not every lead could turn up something, not even the majority.

Kurapika could only do so much at a time. 

He consulted his clan, or rather a grim shrine he had constructed himself. With Scarlet Eyes floating in glass containers, candles illuminating their glow.

_Tell me where they are, I'm almost done. I'm nearly there._

He wordlessly begged the eyes as he cleaned the shrine. He made sure what small rites he could remember were performed.

It was less than they deserved, but it was all Kurapika had left.

There was a small stool in front of the shrine, where he liked to think alone and gather his strength. His phone rang hollowly in the shrine room. He watched with blank eyes as Leorio's name crossed the screen.

Kurapika gripped his phone tighter. The calls weren’t regular anymore, nor the long rambling texts. 

_Incoming Call..._

_Leorio P..._

Kurapika couldn’t simply decline the call. He wondered with each when he’d get the last one.

When would be the last time Leorio would reach out? The last time Kurapika could watch his name on the phone, flashing in the dark as it rang? Leorio's perseverance, his desire, shone like a beacon. Kurapika floated on driftwood, the waves of his own darkness keeping him in sight of the light, but too far away to paddle to it’s safety.

Kurapika tried to hide the calls, sometimes. He’d put his phone back in his pocket, unanswered, still buzzing, almost not even there at all.

_Incoming Call..._

_Leorio P..._

Melody was the only one he didn’t hide it from. He couldn’t really hide anything from Melody.

She always noticed when Leorio called, if she was there. But this time there was nobody. Kurapika was alone, in the dark, the light of Leorio’s call and the scarlet glow of eyes casting the room in a bloody palette.

_Call Ended._

A buzz.

**_Leorio P 22:02_ **

_Call me back._

Kurapika wouldn’t. Couldn't. He wondered if Leorio knew that. He currently had informants searching around for any hint of the remaining Scarlet Eyes. There was more that had to be done and drastically less time to do it in.

Leorio’s text didn't ramble, didn't explain. Instead of berating Kurapika with tales of his life, Leorio's light faltered into fragmented messages and tired resignation.

Kurapika couldn’t blame the man, he couldn’t say that this hadn’t been his idea the whole time. To isolate himself, to push away and frustrate anyone who could get in the way of his goal--anyone he couldn’t use and dispose of when the time came. He had to commend Leorio for hanging on so long.

In short, Kurapika’s goal was to avenge his ckan and retrieve their eyes that had been stolen during their massacre years ago, and that task became harder and more dangerous every day. The fewer people that cared about Kurapika, the fewer that would get hurt.

Someone knocked on the door to the room. No one who knew Kurapika was dumb enough to walk in, let alone comfortable with even getting close to the door. He had a distant thought that Leorio would be clueless, that he wouldn't know why everyone feared his friend, or care.

Leorio would have stalked through that door regardless, if he only knew where it was.

That much, Kurapika could guarantee.

Kurapika sensed Melody’s probing nen at the door. He really couldn't handle another human being at the moment.

“Not now."

She really could become a good friend, but Kurapika didn’t need those. 

As the door creaked open, Kurapika asked himself why he couldn’t answer Leorio’s calls if he allowed Melody to walk freely into a space meant for him only.

Soft footsteps echoed in the room. Kurapika didn't look back, hunched over his legs on his solitary stool. 

"I wanted to let you know that Basho and I will follow up on the next lead. This might be troubling, Kurapika, but we can figure it out."

Kurapika said nothing.

Even if he allowed Melody near while he avoided Leorio, Kurapika couldn't make it easy for her. She remained beside him, not eager to say much to him when he was frustrated. But she didn't leave.

Time passed slowly, in which Kurapika's eyes dried painfully from his disassociated stare into the dark.

_Buzz._

Kurapika's phone lit up with another notification.

**_Leorio 22:20_ **

_I’m tired, and I want to do this the easy way._

Kurapika frowned at the screen. Leorio must not be in a good mood, he thought.

Melody peeked over Kurapika's shoulder and hummed slightly in his ear. The note carried a touch of nen, meant to relax Kurapika's tense posture. 

"Oh, it's Leorio." Melody sounded pleased. She liked Leorio and had tried to tell Kurapika about it every time she saw him. "It sounds like he might have something important to say." 

She always encouraged him to respond, to reach out to his friends.

He never could. 

It must have been close to two years since he replied, or answered a call.

"I'm too busy for whatever it is he wants. I suggest you forget about it."

Melody may like Kurapika, but even she had her limits when he became unreasonable after wasting his time. These days she could do little to combat the raging emptiness he felt, and she must have known it. She typed audibly on her own phone, but Kurapika paid it no mind as she retreated from the room, nose to the screen.

The next day Kurapika spent his time pouring through mission reports, discarding them into piles based on whether they were confirmed, denied, or already recovered.

The piles of denied and unconfirmed leads grew taller as the ache in Kurapika's temple intensified. A low ranking bounty hunter, someone whose name escaped Kurapika's brain, entered the office.

"Kurapika, sir, there's a man here to see you."

"I haven't scheduled any meetings." Kurapika resumed his search through leads without looking up.

"He's from the Zodiac board, sir. He's insisting and I can't find Miss Melody and Mr. Basho. Sir."

Melody and Basho had requested permission to follow up on a rumor late the night before. Kurapika rose, and pushed away the emotion that slammed against his mental walls as the other hunter flinched at his movement.

"Very well."

Kurapika collected himself and exited the room. He operated out of a bar in downtown York New, which is where he found some of his lower ranking associates frozen in place. The man who wanted to speak to him was a large man with a square face, bearing a resemblance to a cow or ox. He held a single colored card in his hand.

"I take it you are Kurapika? I apologize for my handling of your comrades, they're only immobilized."

Kurapika’s arms remained at his sides, yet his chains rustled as he flexed his fingers in anticipation. "I'm a busy man, what is your business with me?"

"I am Mizaistom, a pro hunter and member of the Zodiacs, a group made to assist the late chairman and take care of all matters related to the Hunter Association. To be short, we'd like to recruit you."

"Is that all? I refuse."

Kurapika turned on his heel, to hear the only thing that could stop him in his tracks. "I know you're looking for the Scarlet Eyes of your clan."

He trembled, his own scarlet eyes glowed with fury behind the contacts. 

"I would implore an outsider such as yourself to tread lightly on such a topic." Kurapika's voice dripped ice and fire climbed in his eyes but he could not read anything in Mizaistom's cool expression.

"Explain yourself," Kurapika demanded.

Mizaistom raised his hands in order to display his lack of aggression, or weapons. "I heard all about you from Leorio. He has also joined the Zodiacs. We have an upcoming mission, in which we uncovered some information. I was asked to tell you this and extend an invitation, by the new chairman of the Hunter Association."

Kurapika breathed heavily. His unnamed associate had long left, sensibly sensing an altercation above their payroll. Other than the immobilized hunters, Kurapika and Mizaistom were alone.

Mizaistom lowered his hands, yet kept them visible. His movements spoke of de-escalation training and patience. "If you want more information, you will receive all our knowledge on the matter upon joining us."

Kurapika balled his hands into fists.

So that had been it.

"I also apologize. I will need to make arrangements, but I appreciate the offer." Kurapika's chains remained, but his eyes slowly paled. He couldn't very well refuse when the information he desperately sought may be within reach.

"Sure," Mizaistom said. "I'm just going to release your guys now."

Kurapika nodded. The three who had been stopped scuttled away with a look from their boss. 

In the back of Kurapika's mind, in the deserted part that never got to see the light of day anymore, he warred with whether he should be grateful to Leorio for the help, or if should be angry that Leorio told his backstory to a stranger.

So unused to having the power to make decisions, this part of Kurapika’s brain fizzled without resolve. In the end, he had a credible lead. He didn’t pack anything as he returned to his office. He'd be there for formalities and the meeting only. However he did need to make a few calls which was done easily enough. Melody could take care of things from there.

He locked up his room in the far back, with the eyes, when something occurred to him. That night, when Leorio called and said he wanted to do it the easy way. Was Mizastom the hard way? Or was it that it was harder on Leorio?

Kurapika shook away the thought as he walked toward the only unfamiliar car in the parking lot. Mizaistom sat in the back with him and before instigating any conversation, had called Leorio and put him on speaker. “Hey, we’re on our way back to Headquarters, let Cheadle know please.”

_“Perfect,”_ Leorio said in a phone distorted version of himself. He sounded tired. _“I’m sure I’ll see her in the next minute or two, she can sense that I’ve been gone too long.”_

Leorio chuckled. Kurapika, if he just closed his eyes, might be able to imagine the hand he placed on the back of his neck. His laugh tapered off into a sigh, and Kurapika thought that even if he closed his eyes and tried real hard, he might not be able to imagine Leorio at all.

_“Mizai, could you tell me when you’re getting close to the airport? Cheadle’s sending me to be chauffeur.”_

Kurapika answered before Mizaistom could, curious as to how his old friend would respond. “You’ll know.”

Kurapika’s suspicions were confirmed when Leorio’s voice picked up, but his tone seemed hesitant. _“Oh--heya Kurapika. Been a while. Since you’re so allergic to the phone you should send me your email.”_

“Yeah, I will not be doing that. But I will let you know when we’re close.”

Leorio was silent enough so the two on the other side of the line could hear the faint beeps and ringing of a hospital intercom.

_“Uh Cheadle’s paging me, see you guys!”_

_Click._

Mizaistom had pocketed his phone not a second later.

Kurapika sensed a confrontation in his near future. But he'd bear it. Maybe Leorio would come out with more common sense, but if just for the eyes, Kurapika felt he could allow it.

The plane ride had been less chatty and Kurapika looked out the window for the short duration.

As they exited the airport and entered the parking lot, Kurapika saw him. Leorio stood up at the entrance to the airport garage, scrolling through his phone. He was dressed in his suit and Kurapika noted that Leorio must have been training or working out because the fabric along the shoulders and thighs looked tight, where Kurapika’s own suit hung off him carelessly.

Leorio looked up from his phone. He waved and nodded in Mizaistom's direction before turning toward Kurapika. His eyes darted over him, looking longer than Kurapika thought necessary.

He noticed a number of Leorio’s own changes. The dark circles underneath his glasses, the way Leorio held himself tall, where Kurapika was used to the 6’4” man slouching.

Individuals trained in nen tend to stand out from those who aren't. People who practiced their nen at a master level could constantly maintain Ten, even in sleep. Before, Leorio had barely known one of the principles, but Leorio's Ten appeared strong to Kurapika, though he could tell it spiked with Leorio's emotions. Still, he smirked and tucked his hands firmly and deeply in his pockets in a familiar enough gesture.

  
  


“I’ll catch up at HQ.” Mizaistom broke the silence. He nodded and headed away to another car, an airport valet handing him the key. Leorio beckoned for Kurapika to follow him. 

“Hurry up or try to catch Mizai, Kurapika, it’s your choice.” Leorio led the way deeper into the parking garage. They didn’t have to walk for very long before stopping at a sleek black convertible. Leorio spun the keys around on his finger.

Kurapika had to duck his head to slide into the low car. He couldn't imagine Leorio, as tall as he was, choosing such a car for himself.

Leorio finally released his hands from his pockets as he crammed himself in the car and reached for the steering wheel. Kurapika noticed chapped skin on the backs of Leorio's hands and angry red cuticles. He clicked his seatbelt before leaning back into his seat.

“So,” Leorio placed a hand behind Kurapika's seat and reversed while looking over his shoulder. “Anything cool happen with you lately?”

Kurapika faced forward. Determined to keep his resolve. “No.”

Leorio turned to look at his friend for a second after he pulled up to the toll area. He had to pay a couple jenny to get out of the lot, meaning he had been parked for at least an hour.

Waiting.

Kurapika breathed deep through his nose to clear his mind but all he could smell was Leorio--though he smelled more like antiseptic soap and deodorant than cheap cologne and beer these days.

“Well, there’s been a ton going on. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but I was almost elected chairman. Crazy, right? And Killua’s little sister is just the cutest, they’re on the run from the rest of the Zoldycks now. Gon--”

Leorio paused, eyes glazing over. The genuine affection in his voice stirred the dust in Kurapika's chest. Leorio swallowed hard, focused on the road.

“Gon’s better now. The healed kind of better, at least. He’s gone back home for now, but he seems to be enjoying it. He's going back to school and all.”

Melody had explained, as much as Kurpika would allow her, that Gon and Killua had tried to save the world and landed Gon in the hospital, possibly beyond recovery. Kurapika said nothing. _So, Gon came out fine at the end after all_.

Leorio waited and his face played hide and seek in the streetlights. He always waited, _why did--_

Then Leorio burst. “So it wasn’t just that you’re some busy mafioso, but that you actually don’t want to talk to me. Where’s your excuse now? It’s just you and me in here.”

Kurapika closed his eyes.

“Thank you.”

“What?” Leorio spat out the word.

“Thank you. For getting the information on the eyes, and including me in the mission. As I told your friend, I do not know how I can help, but I will do what I can to assist.”

Leorio sighed. He took a hand off the wheel and rubbed the back of his neck. He became more familiar the longer Kurapika watched him.

It was Leorio's turn not to stay silent at precisely the same time Kurapika’s will broke. Leorio looked tired, yet stubborn and focused on the road. “If all you wanted was a thank you, then I apologize. I should have thanked you earlier.”

Kurapika studied the muscle in Leorio's jaw as it clenched, then disappeared with the passing lamp. “Fuck off, Kurapika. I _don’t_ want a thank you. I want--"

Kurapika watched Leorio's chest struggle to find space for both air and words. “Well I suppose what I want doesn't matter, but I want to talk to you sometimes."

Leorio’s words cut, as they usually did. He was never one to mince words, but now where Kurapika could imagine the past Leorio hollering and acting out, his tone remained steady, letting his words to the dirty work.

“Or just to know you're alive. I watched Gon nearly die. If it wasn’t--if it hadn't been for Killua and his sister Gon _would_ have died.”

The car rolled to a stop at a red light, coloring Leorio's cheeks.

“Is it so wrong for me to not want my friends to die?”

Leorio's face steeled. Gone was the tender emotion, replaced with the resignation Kurapika sensed in his dwindling text messages.

“Is it so wrong that I want to talk to you? Sorry my friendship is a bother, but I don’t want a _thank you_.”

Kurapika watched Leorio as he ran out of steam. As he just furrowed his brows and he stared forward. As the light turned green.

Kurapika swallowed. He knew better, but he could give, just a little, “It’s better, safer this way.”

“Like Yorknew, right?” Leorio shot back. 

Kurapika scoffed. “I don’t know what you mean."

“It was too dangerous for you to meet us in Yorknew. Too dangerous to let your friends help.”

“I have always had the same priorities. If you knew anything about me, you wouldn't be surprised.” Kurapika turned his head to watch out the window. The late night, or early morning sky, threatened rain.

Leorio had remained silent for quite some time. Kurapika thought for just a second that he might not speak again for the remainder of the trip.

Again, Leorio proved Kurapika wrong.

“That’s why I can’t stay mad at you.” Leorio's voice was barely more than a whisper. 

_Always quick to concede._

“That doesn’t mean you can’t be upset with me.” Kurapika gave just a little more.

Leorio's laugh fell flat in the tension of the car. Kurapika thought he should open a window, lest he suffocate.

“Oh it doesn’t mean that I’m not. But more than anything, I just want to know that you make it through the night.” 

Kurapika preferred the silence, and he could see Leorio sulking from his seat.

“Look," Leorio said after several long minutes. He sounded bitter. "Don’t read too hard into it. Long story short, you’re joining the Zodiacs for the information on Tserriednich and the eyes. It doesn’t have to be anything more than that.”

They arrived in Swardani sooner than Kurapika anticipated. Hardly any time passed between seeing the first city sign and when Leorio pulled into a small parking garage. Mizaistom leaned against his rental from the airport. He spoke to a short woman in a dress with long green hair.

Leorio pulled into the space beside them and shut the car off and slipped the keys out of the ignition in one fluid move. Kurapika had suspected Mizaistom either had private business or that he had decided to take a separate car to give the two of them space.

_Maybe both,_ Kurapika thought as he watched Mizaistom give Leorio a questioning look and receive a gloomy thumbs up and attempt at a grin. The lady in the dress turned to Kurapika, accepting the keys from Leorio.

"You must be the friend of Leorio's." She looked him up and down. “We might want to hurry," she warned. 

Leorio grinned, and Kurapika noticed that it wasn’t a smile he had seen before. Again, Leorio had evolved into someone Kurapika didn't know. His smile failed to touch his eyes. A sign that used to say, _I'm only half listening, I'm preoccupied._

Kurapika had no clue what that look meant now. He didn't know how Leorio could be comfortable and familiar yet so different at the same time.

“Let’s not keep them waiting.”

The conversation in the meeting room stopped as the group entered and Kurapika could feel sights on him instantly. Leorio raised his arms to stretch, breaking a little of the ice as he casually diverted everyone's attention. “Where’s my food, Cheadle? You promised.”

Cheadle shook her head, the common response to dealing with Leorio. “It's in your seat. If I could have every member introduce themselves for simplicity sake."

"Everyone, this is Kurapika, he will be replacing Pariston as our Rat. Just to clear things up for _everyone_ , he will not be my Vice-Chairman, as that is a decision I have yet to make.”

The people at the table introduced themselves and their Zodiac position; Botobai the Dragon, Cheadle the Dog, Cluck the Chicken, Gel the Snake, Ginta the Sheep, Kanzai the Tiger, Mizaistom the OX, Pyon the Rabbit, Saiyu the Monkey, and Saccho the Horse.

Kurapika nodded politely at each of them. The only empty seat that remained sat across from Leorio, in the two seats closest to Cheadle at the head of the table.

Leorio had begun stuffing his face with fries like he had never eaten before, despite having coughed some up after Gel whispered something in his ear.

Kurapika neatly gathered the papers in front of him and began flipping through.

Cheadle began the meeting. While most of the Zodiacs could be rowdy, Kurapika noticed that they all gave Cheadle their attention. Whether they were loyal to the late Chairman Netero, they seemed as though they accepted Cheadle readily.

"We are here to discuss potential dangers of the voyage, as well as the final touches for the Hunter Exam. With the possibility of infiltrators. imposters, or spies from Kakin or Beyond specifically."

Kurapika raised his hand. "I will admit I do not know how much help I can be with my abilities, but I have a question."

"Yes?"

Every member of the team stared as if they could bore holes into Kurapika with their collective gaze.

Kurpika wondered if Leorio's first meeting was similar, with the same weight on his shoulders.

"How many infiltrators have you identified and what protocol do you have in place for such a situation? I believe we should expect spies from within the association as well."

The room turned. The first to speak up was Kanzai, the Tiger. "You think we're imposters, huh? Wanna try saying that to my face?" 

Leorio cleared his throat and leaned over the table. "Relax a little. I don’t think he had accused anyone yet, and there are going to be plenty of independent hunters on the trip."

"Kurapika and Leorio made a good point," Mizaistom noted. 

Saccho nodded. "I trust the Intel team, as we should all trust each other right now, and not go about infighting."

Saiyu picked his ear. "I don’t know about the newbies."

Cheadle’s eyebrow twitched, ever so slightly. “Leorio had been with us for a while and I believe he has proved his worth and right to be here. As for Kurapika, I don’t think it’s wise for us make presumptions about a new ally.”

The meeting concluded shortly after that confrontation and Kurapika caught an inviting look from Mizai. He turned to see where Leorio had gone, to find him still in his seat. Pyon had taken Kurapika's seat and talked animatedly with Leorio and Gel.

Pyon turned to Kurapika and winked, before saying something to make Leorio grin and hide his face. Gel pressed her hand to mouth to stifle a giggle.

It looked like Leorio had made good friends in Kurapika’s absence. He turned to leave, careful to not alert Leorio. 

Mizaistom opened the door as Kurapika approached and followed him outside. He led Kurapika to a room in a deserted hall and only once the door shut behind them did Mizaistom address him. 

“I couldn’t speak candidly in front of the group, but I agree with you on the infiltrator idea. I suspect someone in the Zodiacs, as well as many of this year’s Hunter Exam applicants.”

Kurapika nodded. Mizaistom didn’t only _appear_ to be rational and logical. 

“With that being said, I was hoping to discuss a few things with you, namely your ability. I don’t need to know everything, just what might pertain to the mission at hand. I’ll reveal mine to you, and I hope you appreciate that I did not ask in the meeting as a sign of trust.”

Kurapika nodded, foreseeing Mizaistom as a useful ally. “Well, let’s get started then.”


	2. Not A Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leorio meets his new instructor and Kurapika? Well, he has issues.

**_i like cool shirts, i like cold rings_ **

**_i want a big house, but i'm hiding_ **

**_i want a brain that doesn't hate me_ **

**_i wanna see my stupid fucking friends daily_ **

Leorio’s shift at the hospital just ended and he hadn’t made it off the grounds before his phone began to ring. The weather bore down on him, cold enough to cut but not enough to snow.

Cheadle's voice crackled through the phone. _“I have some other things to attend to, so for at least the time being your nen studies and medical studies will be separate. You’re to meet your new instructor back at HQ.”_

Leorio kicked a rock along the pavement as he walked.

_“I expect you to train with him as diligently as you do with me, and I will know if you don't. Also your official lessons are down to two a week for exams, but I still expect high scores and nothing less.”_

“Alright, alright,” Leorio chuckled. He had a lot on his plate and he had been told it showed on his face. He honestly couldn't remember his last day off. “Let me guess, I also have an anatomy paper due by the end of the week.”

_“Now you do. I have to go, see you soon Leorio.”_

“See ya, Cheadle.”

**_Cheadle 14:03_ **

_He’ll meet you at HQ._

Hunter Association Headquarters was about a twenty minute walk from the hospital, about forty five minutes from his apartment by subway. It turned out to not be such a bad commute because he hardly ever got to go home anyway. 

Leorio took his time on foot. The sun was at its warmest for the day and it heated Leorio’s skin pleasantly, despite the chill. He typically only saw the sun through windows these days.

Anxiety climbed in Leorio’s gut as he realized Cheadle hadn’t told him who he would be meeting. Leorio had met a lot of incredibly skilled hunters in such a short matter of time that he couldn’t help but feel inadequate. Then to be faced with what his exam mates had been through to realize that even if he had been around he wouldn’t have been of any use to his friends.

Any of them.

It was partly the reason he couldn’t blame Kurapika for pushing him to the side. Kurapika needed strong people to help on his mission, and Leorio just didn't make the cut. Not like Melody who worked with him, or Mizai apparently who he followed after meetings.

Cheadle didn’t look down on Leorio. She gave him hell in terms of her lessons, but she was the one who reached out to him about joining the Zodiacs. She said others in the association agreed with her decision. This opportunity he had been given to prove himself seemed too good to be true. He wanted to prove to everyone that Cheadle made the right decision.

The Hunter Association HQ was a wide, tall building in the heart of Swardani city. The lobby was pristine with a quick moving service desk, plenty of places to sit, and an abundance of elevators. Hunters simply didn’t have the time to wait in lines and most lacked the patience.

Leorio searched around the lobby, but no one came forward, and he couldn’t recognize anyone. 

_Should I call out? Wait?_

Just as he opened his mouth he thought back to one of his lessons with Cheadle. She said people could use their aura to deceive others, or hide things. There was a technique Cheadle mentioned. She said he would need to learn it eventually, but that he needed a firm grasp on the basic principles first.

Leorio focused his aura to his eyes, he could remember that much of the lesson. Also he figured it to be common sense, because if someone wanted to hide, you had to try to _see_ them. Beyond that, he had no clue. He could feel his aura, like a waving pressure around his eyes. He took a second look around the lobby and noticed a thick plume of smoke in the room that definitely hadn’t been there before. He stood still, as if moving might disrupt the fragile image. The smoke rose from a couch facing away from the entrance, at the far left side of the room.

Leorio squinted and the weak technique dropped. He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his scrubs, hoping that he wasn’t going to make a fool of himself. At the end of the room, on a couch facing the wall, was Morel Mackernasey. A tall, tan, broad older man with a hook nose, white hair, and sunglasses. He carried a large pipe, but with Leorio’s aura not focused, he could no longer see the smoke trailing out of it.

Leorio felt the need to gamble whenever he needed a confidence boost. 

“Hey there, Mr. Morel. Good to see you again, but surely you saw the “no smoking signs” all around the lobby.”

Morel’s shaded eyes gave nothing away, but his mouth cracked into a sharp grin. “Morel’s fine, I guess you caught me. So you already know Gyo, huh?”

Leorio shrugged, “I remembered Cheadle saying something about it, but that was my first time trying.”

Morel crossed one leg over the other. Leorio noticed that he no longer had a plethora of bandages. If he had any at all, they weren’t visible. He’d been suffering from severe injuries the last time Leorio had seen him.

“I see. Well, as you may have guessed, Cheadle has asked me to assist your training before the voyage. She has quite a lot on her plate, so she’s entrusted you to me. The fact that she believes in you means I know not to make it easy.”

Leorio nodded. He remembered Morel telling him not to act hot headed back at the hospital while Gon recovered. “I expected nothing less. Cheadle keeps me on a rigorous schedule anyway.”

“Good. There are a number of training rooms here at headquarters. I’ll grab us one and since it looks like you just got off work, you can change into something more comfortable.”

Leorio nodded.

In the barracks on the fourth floor there was a restroom and two vending machines, as well as a table, couch, and some rickety folding chairs. Dull grey lockers lined the walls. Leorio threw his change in the vending machines for a water bottle and some kind of energy snack bar. He didn’t know what was in them or how they were supposed to be energy snacks, but they were cheap and easy.

Leorio kept a locker in the room and grabbed a pair of shorts and tank top out of it and folded his scrubs. He pounded the energy bar and placed his scrubs in his locker which he sealed with nen, a neat trick Pyon taught him when he first joined.

Leorio took his water and ran down the stairs back to the lobby. There was no sign of Morel and he contemplated asking the desk lady what room he had requested, but he suspected that the training lesson had already begun.

After telling Morel that he hadn’t used Gyo before, perhaps he wanted to make him use it now to find him. To see if he could manage it a second time with no instruction.

Leorio manifested his aura around himself, an act which had come naturally to him as an Emitter. He then imagined his aura flowing up to his face to focus around his eyes. Hands in his pockets, Leorio searched around the room again. Morel had left the couch he’d been on previously leaving no trace of his smoke. Leorio read the signs on the walls, directing traffic almost like in an airport. Training rooms were mostly on the 3rd floor. He focused his Gyo towards the stairs and smoke, where there hadn’t been any before, rose up and curled out of sight. Leorio followed the curl of smoke up 5 flights of stairs before it ended at the only door in that section of the floor. Leorio entered and faced Morel for the second time.

Morel had taken a seat on the floor, reclining against one hand while using the other to hold his pipe. “Good timing. Take a seat and tell me what you know about the four principles of nen, and what you know about yours specifically.”

Leorio sat across from his new mentor. “Cheadle gave me some kind of test with a cup and a leaf. The water changed colors, and she said I was an emission type or whatever that means.”

The test had been frustrating, but only because he thought _getting the leaf_ was the test and spent his entire lunch break looking for the perfect one, only to have to wait until after his shift to take the test. Having just finished a twelve hour shift and exhausted, Leorio had faced Cheadle in her office with the leaf in hand. She pulled him into her office and gave him a glass of water to put the leaf in. She said to focus his energy around the glass. The color of the water steadily changed to a bright green

Leorio realized Morel had been waiting for him to continue, patiently puffing.

“Ten is the focus of the mind and allowing your nen to run through your body. Meditation is recommended to hone it. Ren intensifies your aura and pushes it out from your body. Zetsu is meant to keep your nen or your aura from leaking and giving away your position. Hatsu is focusing your nen in order to use it in a fight.

Morel nodded, smoke curling from his nostrils. “Simple enough, right? These are the four things you should be practicing on a regular basis. Exuding, stopping, focusing, and moving your nen, or your aura.”

Leorio felt as though he were in a kiddie lesson, but he allowed himself to breathe through it. Morel could almost read his thoughts and actions back at the hospital, when he yelled and argued about wanting to talk to Killua. Leorio calmed himself and bit back a gut reaction to start acting out. 

“What are you thinking about?” Morel asked, derailing his train of thought.

“About how childish I acted last time we met, and how I should probably just let you teach me without distraction.”

Morel put aside his pipe and crossed his arms. “Emitters often have a hard time controlling or boxing up their feelings. If you want my honesty, I think you could stand to think things through a little more, and _meditate._ ”

“Okay.”

“I meant now.”

“Right.” Leorio crossed his legs and rested his wrists across his knees. Cheadle had made him meditate on breaks so at least this was something he could do.

He tried to empty his mind of everything not involved in his lesson. He thought about controlling his aura. Meditating was something that required him to be still with no interruptions, and his meditation had fallen to the wayside when his workload picked up.

Morel said nothing, and when Leorio allowed himself to be criticized, he realized that he needed training because he was nowhere near the level of the man before him. Nowhere near Gon, or Killua, or Kurapika.

So Leorio took the opportunity. If wasn’t able to sleep, he could at least shut his eyes for a while.

After what could have been minutes, or hours, Morel puffed on his pipe, releasing a thick cloud. Leorio could feel it against his skin. He felt as though Morel’s smoke was an attempt to get him to lose his focus.

Leorio breathed deeply through his nose, posture tall but no hint of rigidity. The smoke began to prickle at his eyes, but he didn’t move to wipe them. Leorio couldn’t allow himself to drop his Ten for anything. He couldn’t lose a second of focus.

Finally, Morel called for an end to the meditation. Leorio stood and cracked his back.

“I heard that was bad for you.” Morel said.

“I think I’ll be alright.”

Next, Morel had him demonstrate his Hatsu, Zetsu, and Ren. By the end Leorio dripped sweat, his hair fell out of its spikes and into a mess. Maintaining his Zetsu was the hardest. According to Morel, an emitter had an easier time exuding aura rather than containing it. Every second he pushed himself past his limit he felt as though his body would split open.

Morel stood, having never once risen from his pillow on the ground. He may not be covered in bandages, but Leorio suspected one or two still injuries plagued him.

“I think this is good enough for today. I want you focusing on your Ten and Zetsu whenever possible.”

“I can keep going,” Leorio argued.

Morel’s face twisted into a grin. “I’m sure you could, but you have barely four hours until your next shift at the hospital n--”

Leorio didn't need another word to convince him. He rushed to grab his things from the locker and bid a hasty farewell to his new teacher. As he left HQ he ran straight out of the lobby to avoid running into anyone who could ask him anything or start a conversation. It was still forty five minutes to the apartment. Leorio sighed and headed for the subway and pulled out his phone. He tried to keep in regular contact with Gon, and Killua _would_ text back, but either he was on the run or Alluka had his phone to play games. He responded late, but he was consistent.

For general things, Leorio liked to send them through a group chat he had with the boys.

It used to have Kurapika in it, but things got complicated, Gon lost his phone during his business with the chimera ants and Killua had to get a new one when he went on the run.

  
  


**_Group:_** **_Boyzzzz_**

**_OLD MAN 1:03_ **

_Hey I just wanna say I love you lil beast mode guys and this nen stuff is hard and im proud of you both xoxoxoxo_

Leorio caught the subway just in time, finding it nearly deserted as always. The late subway was always empty. The only other person in the car had faced away from Leorio the moment he entered, dressed head to toe in black.

Leorio pulled a notebook out of his briefcase and a pen to work on the anatomy paper Cheadle assigned him last minute. The ride to his neighborhood wouldn’t take forty five minutes but he still had to walk a ways. He'd have to remember to start bringing a jacket.

Leorio yawned and snapped his notebook shut. He'd gone longer without sleep, but his eyes ached and his feet ached and he just wanted--

Leorio shook his head. He _wanted_ to become a doctor and to be useful to his friends. He opened the notebook again, reading over his scratched notes. 

The other person in the car coughed and Leorio narrowed his eyes and faced away from the other, shielding his notes even though there was no logical reason why the stranger in black would want them. He tried to remember what Cheadle had said about sensing someone else's aura. 

_What was that technique called again?_

_No, I need to write._

Leorio slapped his cheeks and trudged forward with his paper. With any luck he could get his main points written down and all he would have to do later is refine it. He didn't notice when the other passenger got off two stops before him but soon the announcement for his stop interrupted his writing. He took his time walking through his neighborhood as he checked his phone.

**2 new messages**

**_Group: The Boyzzzz_ **

**_Gon 03:08_ **

_It can be hard! You should get some sleep_

**_Gon 03:09_ **

_We’re super proud of you too Leorio._

Leorio came to his complex and unlocked the door. He dropped his things haphazardly on the floor and crawled onto the couch. His limbs felt like lead. His feet ended up off of the edge of the couch and the small blanket on the back didn’t quite cover him. Leorio didn’t care and simply scrolled through his old messages with the boys. 

There was a picture of Killua and his sister Alluka in the snow. Gon messaged the most, either avoiding schoolwork or showing them things around Whale Island.

Leorio smiled. He impulsively scrolled back to his other messages, the most recent ones being from Cheadle, Pyon--who had been texting him during the last meeting, Gel, the Zodiac group chat, and after _that_ Gon and Killua individually.

Then at the bottom: Kurapika.

His messages to Kurapika one year before the election and earlier had been frequent, not daily but regular.

Despite the fact that there hadn’t been a reply in the past two years. In the past year they tapered to a more biweekly thing. Then Leorio only called when he had a bad day or wanted Kurapika to know something. Then the calls' main purpose was to sardonically ask if Kurapika was even alive.

Then the election happened and shit hit the fan. 

**_Tuesday August 5_ **

**_Leorio 09:46_ **

_Hey man call me back, its important._

**_Leorio 09:58_ **

_I swear, if you call me back just this once I’ll stop. That's what you want, right?_

**_Leorio 10:33_ **

_I don’t know wht I expected_

**_Saturday August 9_ **

**_Leorio 03:11_ **

_I hope you’re alive._

**_Leorio 03:15_ **

_Gon’s alive, if it matters to you_

**_Sunday March 3_ **

**_Leorio 23:47_ **

_U no, i wondered how hard it is to find time to text . When youre busy_

**_Leorio 23:55_ **

_Ya see, i’m busy too now. Nd i have to be at work at 5am nd im drunkt oo AND i have_

_time to text you_

**_Monday March 4_ **

**_Leorio 00:02_ **

_Funny huh_

**_Leorio 00:25_ **

_Heyyyy, if you miss me even a little bit, don’t text me back_

**_Leorio 04:57_ **

_Awe thanks Kurapika, I miss you, too._

**_Friday May 9_ **

**_Leorio 22:02_ **

_Call me back._

Leorio stopped there. Of course, he had nothing of the like from Kurapika. Leorio cringed at the thought of some of the voicemail messages he'd left the blond, thankful that it seemed like Kurapika hadn't listened to them.

Leorio had the time to text the boys, he could spare a minute or two for Kurapika. His finger danced over the call button. Instead he turned his screen off. Now that he knew Kurapika hadn’t died, a part of the walls around his heart splintered.

Kurapika was alive and kept avoiding him. 

_Nothing is gonna change._

Leorio dropped his phone off the side of the couch and turned around. Thinking about the situation would be pointless and only keep Leorio up all night, letting his head run wild with negativity. He nuzzled close to the back of the couch, his hot breath warming his face as it bounced back. Within moments he started falling asleep, his last thought--once he was too tired to be hurt by it--was that Kurapika hadn’t seemed happy to see him in the slightest.

  
  
  


**_let our hearts run round in circles_ **

**_while we fall apart_ **

**_we’re hungover in the city of dust_ **

**_let our minds run round in circles_ **

**_while we figure it all out_ **

  
  


Kurapika prided himself on thinking every situation through, on expecting every outcome. Somewhere in his search for his clan’s eyes, he had become out of touch with most of the rest of the world. If it didn’t pertain to his mission, he had no use for it. That was how he ended up in Swardani with no chance at finding a hotel room for the next month.

Apparently, every four years the V5 conducted a large sports event and the host city this year happened to be Swardani.

Kurapika called before he even got to the city, but every hotel he called had no vacancies. Some began compiling waitlists in case a guest didn’t show. With nowhere to go and the weather starting to take a turn for the worst, Kurapika arrived at HQ hours early for the Zodiac meeting. The clouds broke like an omen just as he entered the conference room.

Leorio and a few other Zodiacs had already arrived, focusing on their unit’s tasks for the voyage. As if Leorio had a sixth sense specifically for Kurapika, he turned before Kurapika could dodge behind Mizaistom. He pointed to something on the paper between Cheadle, Gel, and himself before excusing himself to greet Kurapika.

“Hey, we weren’t expecting you until the meeting. Are you here to prep?”

Kurapika busied himself with the cuffs of his suit in order to avoid Leorio’s eyes. “I couldn’t get a hotel room, actually, and I didn’t want to get caught in the rain.”

Leorio hummed. “Yeah, with the entire world staying in Swardani that’s bound to be a nightmare.””

Leorio paused, but Kurapika could tell he hadn’t finished his thought. He waited a moment before edging more towards Mizaistom, but Leorio caught him by the arm. Just as quickly, he dropped it.

“Sorry, I just--” Leorio cleared his throat. “I have an apartment just outside the city. You can always stay there.”

Kurapika’s arm tingled where Leorio touched it.

“No thanks,” Kurapika said. He looked up to watch Leorio’s face fall from hopeful to dejected. Quicker than Kurapika would have thought, Leorio appeared to brush off the rejection and headed back to his unit with a shrug. He didn’t miss Leorio’s bowed head as he rejoined the medical team.

When Cheadle called for the meeting to begin the Zodiacs took their seats at the table. Leorio seemed distracted as he sat down, but he answered Cheadle’s questions with ease. The rain picked up outside the window as the meeting concluded. There was still much to discuss, but Mizaistom didn’t want to reveal too much information to the infiltrator. After the first meeting Kurapika and Mizaistom had developed a plan to find them using Kurapika’s chains from another room while he watched a live feed of the Zodiacs.

After the meeting ended Kurapika noticed that Saiyu had bolted for the door the moment Cheadle released them. He nodded his chin to Mizaistom, who had already been watching. With Saiyu having taken Kurapika’s position of the first to leave, Leorio managed to catch up with him at the door, reaching for his arm again. Kurapika jerked away before Leorio could touch him again.

Leorio had carefully wiped the wince from his features by the time Kurapika met his gaze. "It’s raining pretty hard and it's late, take this.”

A bronze key between the man's fingers.

"What’s that?”

“Jeez, I know you’ve been living under a rock, but you know what a key is, right?. It’s for my apartment.”

Kurapika froze as Leorio pushed the key toward him. He didn’t understand how after everything, all of the missed calls and frigidity Kurapika displayed, Leorio would still--

“I’m busy, Leorio.”

Leorio’s face twisted into a cold scowl which was far worse than the mask of indifference he’d put on earlier. “Believe it or not, so am I.”

Yet while Kurapika had been dodging calls, Cheadle had seen something in Leorio, his determination to save his friend, his determination to use his Hunter status as a way to heal and help others. Kurapika assumed Cheadle had seen and taken a liking to what he had seen in Leorio himself. As irritating as he could be, for as upset as he had every right to be, Leorio hadn’t hesitated in extending his hand yet again. To offer something for Kurapika’s sake. It was nearing three in the morning and Kurapika really didn’t have anywhere else to go.

“I’m never home anyway, I’d doubt that we’d run into each other at all.” Leorio _was_ dressed in scrubs rather than his usual suit, though he still stubbornly carried his briefcase. Kurapika never knew Leorio not to wear his heart on his sleeve, especially if he was upset. The Leorio that stood before him was the same, no matter how much Kurapika denied it. Even behind exhaustion, hurt, and resignation, he still reached out his hand to help.

Leorio sighed when Kurapika merely watched him. There were dark circles under his eyes, and his scowl slipped into something sad. “Take the key already, tough guy.” At that, Cheadle called Leorio over. They were apparently discussing the final touches for the Hunter Exam and where Cheadle went, Leorio followed. 

Still meeting Kurapika’s eyes, Leorio dropped his spare key, winking when Kurapika’s hand dashed out to catch it reflexively. “I gotta go.”

Kurapika’s eyes turned to Mizaistrom who would be staying behind as well, only for Mizai to avert his eyes. With another glance Kurapika realized that every Zodiac minus Saiyu had witnessed his spat with Leorio.

Embarrassed, he pocketed the key as his phone buzzed with a notification. He read the first notification as a second popped up.

**_Leorio P. 03:13_ **

_My addy: 1157 53rd ST Apt B30_

**_Leorio P. 03:13_ **

_Huh, you DO check your phone_

Mizai had joined Cheadle and Leorio, the other Zodiacs gathered their belongings and began heading out, other work to be done. Leorio frowned at Kurapika from across the room, before his head snapped in Cheadle’s direction, more than likely answering a question.

Kurapika put his phone away without dismissing the notifications and headed for the door, politely yielding to the other departing members. He was careful to watch each of them as they left, assessing what he could from the scenario. It was a habit he’d developed, and it typically served him well. 

Despite the tension between himself and Leorio, Kurapika’s heart soothed at the thought that Leorio was the one who got him here to this last stage. Part of him wished he could show Leorio how grateful he was.

Leorio offered up his apartment, even knowing he’d personally get nothing out of it. Kurapika thought he understood Leorio, but he remembered underestimating him before, in the Hunter Exam. Had he really done it again? Had the distance he put between himself and Leorio been so great that he had to learn him all over again?

_Surely not_ , Kurapika thought. He fingered the key in his pocket as he walked.

He had already been thinking about hotels, so what was the difference, really?

All of Kurapika waged war constantly, his conscience with his motivation, his brain and his heart, his emotions against themselves. Kurapika was an ever-blooming accident in motion though he seemed polished. His need to save his friend from him warred with the fact that Leorio knew everything from the beginning, the fact that he was comfortable telling him about his goals, the fact that Leorio, as tired, and angry as he should be right now, is telling him to rest.

Kurapika didn’t know the way to Leorio’s address, but his cell phone had GPS. It would be wise to leave, but it couldn’t hurt to just drop by the apartment.

What Kurapika hated the most about Leorio, was that the idiot gave him options. Instead of Kurapika running off into the night, he had the option of a warm bed, a friend with a shoulder. Leorio might be one of the few people who would genuinely care if--

The apartment complex was large and the lobby inside seemed busy even at this time. Of course, it was a Hunter residence, so there were Hunters barely getting their days started while others could be dragging themselves home through injuries and nightmares.

Signs on the walls correlated to different towers of the complex. Kurapika opted for the stairs, regretting it when he realized he had six floors to climb. Once up the stairs, Leorio’s apartment was the first to the left. Kurapika braced himself.

The apartment was dark and cold. The curtainless window was pitch black, a new moon hiding away. Kurapika looked around, scouting the apartment. The coffee table held a few textbooks, haphazardly open one inside the other. The couch looked plush, the leather cool to Kurapika’s fingertips as he passed his hand along it. The kitchen laid off the left side of the room, hidden behind a small wall. A desk pushed up against the window on the far side of the room looked more organized. As Kurapika looked at the expansive bookshelf to his right, something gold caught his eye. 

It was a picture frame, inside it a photograph of Leorio hugging three others. Kurapika recognized the day the picture was taken, his expression one of fond exasperation. The Kurapika in the photo had his arm around Leorio. Kurapika remembered the feelings in him that day. He had missed every person in that picture over the past two years, but he missed himself the most. 

He heard that Killua and Gon went through hell. That Leorio had nearly become Chairman. If Leorio had changed so much in that amount of time, would Kurapika even recognize the other two?

Kurapika was shocked to feel tears hot on his cheeks. He found the bathroom and ran cold water over his hands splashing his face. When he looked in the mirror his cheeks and nose were flushed. He thought for a second that he looked younger, more fragile.

When he touched his face his chains rattled, pulling him back into reality. He quickly cleaned his mess and made sure there was nothing out of the ordinary in the house, before leaving and locking the door. He took the stairs several at a time, intending never to come back.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments, constructive criticism, keysmashes, kudos, etc are ALWAY appreciated  
> the lyrics that denote POV switches are from:  
> Lowkey As Hell - Waterparks  
> Hungover in the City of Dust - Autoheart  
> you can listen to my [ leopika playlist here ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=QNcdmt3WQp-XxrWYSh7w2A)


	3. One Step Toward A Memory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leorio gets his ass kicked and Kurapika doesn't know what he wants anymore.

**_instead of picking all the flowers you were digging a grave,_ **

**_tripping over skeletons along the way_ **

**_thinking you were one of them, give me a break_ **

**_truth be told, I’m like you_ **

**_keep myself together with a pen and some glue_ **

October was crisp in the city, with the threat of snow on the horizon. Leorio took off his coat, dressed in thin scrubs that were a size or two big and a pair of athletic sneakers. The subway had closed several stops for the night due to the impending weather, including Leorio’s. The closest open stop would drop him off twenty minutes away from his apartment. With a sigh Leorio left the comfort of the underground, his breath fogging the air. He bent to the ground in a stretch before he began to jog.

Leorio may be an idiot, but he wasn’t stupid. He had been standing all day and his feet were already killing him. If he didn’t stretch now, the training session with Morel, that he was already late for, would be brutal. The jog invigorated him after a while, his senses temporarily cleared of exhaustion and replaced with cold air shocking his lungs. He checked his watch, hoping Morel would be forgiving.

_What would Gon do? Or Killua?_

Well, they probably would have challenged each other from the beginning and ran the whole way with no complaints, except for who won.

_Alright, this one's for Gon and Killua_. 

Leorio kicked his ass into gear, maintaining a steady rhythm, and once evening his stride he started to pick up the pace. His head rushed with blood, his pulse deafening him.

_What would Kurapika do?_

Probably have had an escape car for just that reason.

If Leorio kept up his pace he could reduce the amount of time in half, considering he would still have to run all the way back to the station. He counted his breaths, his steps, attuned them to the same beat. If he didn’t make the light at the intersection, he’d have to wait.

Did he dare?

What would those kids do?

Leorio ran through a slow light that quickly turned red. As a car horn started blaring at him, he gave one final push. The complex loomed over him before long and he slowed. He controlled his harsh breathing as he unlocked his front door. He nearly choked on his dry throat when he saw Kurapika’s small frame on the couch and Leorio’s thin blanket draped over his side.

“Holy shit, I’m dreaming.” Leorio cursed himself for speaking aloud, but Kurapika didn’t stir.

Leorio sat his briefcase down gently. He had promised Kurapika that they wouldn’t run into each other and that’s likely why Kurapika ultimately took him up on his offer to stay at the apartment. Leorio was determined to leave quickly and even considered leaving immediately, but he wasn’t eager to have made a near two hour commute for nothing. He froze as his phone rang. He groaned when he saw the caller ID, not having left the hospital less than an hour ago.

“Heya, Cheadle, miss me so bad already?” Leorio’s tone was light despite the strain in his throat.

_“Hey, sorry to call you so soon. Did you make it home?”_

“Yeah, I came to get clothes to train in and a change of clothes for tomorrow’s shift and the meeting.”

“ _Sorry for being so cruel with this week’s schedule. Have you heard from Kurapika by any chance? The intel tem is having an impromptu meeting.”_

Leorio kept his back to Kurapika, keeping his voice low. He started walking down the hall. “No, I haven’t heard from him.

Saiyu piped up in the background. Cheadle must have him on speaker. _“Aw, Pyon his boyfriend’s ghosting him again.”_

Leorio fought to keep his voice level, addressing his statement to Cheadle directly. “It’s not like that, and everyone seems to know enough for that to be clear. The meeting is tomorrow, so I’m sure he’ll be there.”

Kurapika had been to all the major meetings and often helped Mizai with preparations, but didn’t respond to group communications. But if Kurapika could sleep for just a little while, stay a little while, then Leorio wasn’t keen to pass on the message.

_Not like Kurapika would listen to me either._

_“Frankly, I don’t care what it isn’t or is, just remember you need to focus on your training. The voyage is bound to be brutal.”_

“Don’t worry about me, Cheadle, I’m a big boy. I’m not going to get distracted. Not that there is anything to distract me. I’m heading to HQ now.”

Leorio hung up with a scowl and changed into grey sweatpants that would become unbearable once he started training, but would protect him against the cold. He wore a thin tank top that he planned to cover with his coat. He also packed a duffel with changes of underwear, his suit, scrubs, and some shorts.

Leorio walked to the door, suppressing his urge to look back at Kurapika. He was just glad the blond took him up on his offer. He put on his coat and gathered his things, before locking the door softly.

Leorio slipped into Zetsu before leaving the subway station for a second time. He entered the HQ building and ran up to the usual room, the same one Morel had requested the first time. He pressed his hand on the door and it opened to reveal Morel and one of his students, a tall, broad, and very shirtless man. Leorio recognized him as Knuckle Bine, one of the guys who had been with Gon and Killua throughout their ordeal with the chimera ants.

“Very good Zetsu, Leorio.” Morel only complimented him when he had truly done well, so Leorio allowed himself a moment of pride. “This is Knuckle, as I’m sure you remember.”

Leorio nodded and greeted the other man in the room. Knuckle looked like his face had been set in a tired scowl, but as he spoke Leorio noticed that a lot of that look had to do with the deep set lines running down from the inner corners of his eyes.

“Nice to see you again,” Knuckle said. “If you haven’t figured it out, you’ll be sparring with me today.”

Morel stepped off to the side of the room to give the two space. Leorio cast off his coat and bag into a corner and took a defensive stance. Knuckle hadn’t moved at all. Leorio shifted his weight between his feet, waiting, but his patience didn’t hold out for long as he leapt for his training partner.

Knuckle sidestepped the move with ease and slapped Leorio on the back with an open palm. It didn’t hurt much, but Leorio saw the corner of Knuckle’s mouth quirk, as though satisfied with himself. Leorio turned on his heel, sure that he had caught his balance, only to be pushed over from behind.

Cursing as he stumbled, Leorio began to feel agitation build in his chest. He noticed that Knuckle hadn’t moved from where he’d slapped him and Morel--Morel seemed to be watching lazily. Back in his defensive position, Leorio tried calming his mind. If Knuckle didn’t move, and Morel didn’t move, then what pushed him over?

“Fuck,” Leorio said aloud and focused his aura to his eyes. Sure enough, Morel’s smoke curled like tentacles throughout the room. Not only that, but there appeared to be a fairy or bug or _something_ hovering next to him. A small number appeared across the thing’s stomach.

“What the hell is this?” Leorio asked.

Knuckle cracked another grin. “Leorio, meet APR. APR, meet Leorio. You can only see APR when you activate your Gyo.”

Leorio pushed the small fairy thing with his finger and it floated away before returning to his side. “Kind of a silly looking guy, huh?”

The number on APR’s tummy went up and it said as much in a tiny voice that sounded like bells being rung. 

“What the hell does that mean?”

In lieu of explaining, Knuckle hit him again. A closed fist hurt more than a slap and the punch knocked Leorio out of his defensive stance. His Gyo slipped, just long enough for Morel to tangle an invisible tendril of smoke around his ankle and pull.

Leorio fell, but he managed to catch himself and rolled to a stand, Gyo back in place. He began panting, his eyes flicking between the two men in front of him as he tried to strategize. When Leorio glanced at his side, he saw that APR’s number had gone up again.

_It goes up when he hits me, but the last time it did that he wasn’t anywhere near me._

Maintaining Gyo took most of Leorio’s effort and concentration. If he released his Gyo he might be able to dodge Knuckle, but he’d be vulnerable to Morel’s smoke attacks. If he focused on avoiding the smoke, he’d give Knuckle a major opening. Morel still hadn’t moved and Knuckle looked like he had barely broken a sweat. Leorio groaned, unsure of what to do. 

Leorio allowed himself to be hit a couple more times, or rather he didn’t try to dodge. As he suspected, at the moment of each impact APR’s number increased, but also roughly every couple of seconds even when Knuckle was on the other side of the room. As he failed to jump over a smoke tendril, Leorio realized that even though APR was Knuckle’s ability, Morel’s attacks also caused the number to go up.

Frustrated, Leorio recalled the moment in the election when he punched Ging, Gon’s father. His emotions had been heightened by the sight of the kid wrapped head to toe in bandages, dying. Leorio was frustrated now, but it was nothing compared to the gut-wrenching disgust and contempt for a father that refused to see his dying son.

Since the election Leorio hadn’t been able to conjure his nen that way, at least not in a fight. Cheadle showed him how he could use his ability to scan the human body for abnormalities, but she also said that it could be used for much more than that.

Leorio dodged Knuckle’s next attack and nearly fell into a cloud of Morel’s smoke as he calculated his next move. He huffed in exhaustion on the other side of the room close to the wall. Knuckle, who had not made contact, merely brushed himself off and remained by the opposite wall.

_Just stay like that_.

Leorio let his frustration loose in the form of a growl and he punched the wall beside him. 

Nothing happened.

Leorio brought every emotion he’d ever felt to the forefront of his being and channeled it into his fist. Images of his friends flooded his mind, the loneliness he felt at every missed call to Kurapika, the elation at Gon’s recovery. He punched the wall again, his fist glowing with a sharp green energy. As his fist connected with the wall, blood dripping from his split skin, a portal the color of Leorio’s nen appeared in both the wall beside him and the wall to Knuckle’s left. The image of Leorio’s hand burst through and clipped the side of Knuckle’s head.

As Leorio hoped, APR announced that the interest Leorio had accrued decreased, and by quite a bit. His hand stung but his euphoria at landing a hit superseded his pain. 

“So I just have to land a hit on you for this thing to go back down?” he asked.

Knuckle rubbed his temple. “Finally, he gets it.”

Leorio’s thighs burned, his hand ached, he had only a few hours of sleep under his belt, but he hadn’t felt this good in a long time.

“And if it drops back to zero?”

Knuckle crossed his arms, his grin cocked sideways. “What do you think?”

“Okay wait, hold on.” Leorio ran to his bag and rifled through it.

“Leorio, what are you doing?” Morel asked.

Leorio pulled his shorts out of the bag and changed, no shame in stripping to his underwear in front of the others.

“You should have done that before!” Knuckle hollered.

“I was cold!” Leorio’s face burned as he realized his old shorts rode up high on his thighs.

Leorio struggled to manage his Gyo and use his nen ability in tandem, but instead of idly waiting for Leorio to get a clue, Knuckle cracked his neck and got serious.

Over previous lessons, Morel had explained more advanced techniques similar to Gyo. Ken, a combination of Ren and Ten, allowed Leorio to block Knuckle’s attacks with his aura when he couldn’t avoid them. When he expanded his Ken around his body, he became able to sense Morel’s smoke tendrils before they got close.

Leorio felt more confident now that he had made progress. Knuckle was an impressive fighter, especially in close quarters. Leorio could block, or even dodge now that he could sense Morel’s smoke, but to get off another shot while up close was nearly impossible without getting hit himself.

Leorio doubted Knuckle would let him cross the length of the room again, having seen his remote punch in action. Instead he forced Leorio to think on his feet and adapt through a barrage of attacks. Leorio dropped to the ground as Knuckle’s fist flew at him. He grabbed Knuckle’s ankle with one hand and used his other to activate his remote punch. Leorio threw his weight into toppling the other man, who hadn’t anticipated the takedown.

The punch connected with Knuckle’s face again, dropping Leorio’s APR to a measly double digits. He stood from his crouched position and offered his hand to the man on the ground. Knuckle grinned as he yanked Leorio down towards himself. 

Before he could land on top of Knuckle and into a trap, Leorio caught himself, but his opponent used the momentum to pull himself up and into a defensive stance. Knuckle’s grin faltered as he saw Leorio’s lowered APR.

They were both panting and sweating profusely, but Leorio refused to give in. If he could manage one more hit, and not get hit in the process, he might be able to drop the APR to zero.

The pair circled each other with caution. With each pass Leorio allowed himself to be backed into a wall. 

_Just one more._

Leorio felt the cool wall flush against his back and punched behind him. Knuckle caught the hand that appeared to his left, locking the two in an intense showdown. Knuckle wound his arm back for another hit where he had Leorio pinned against the wall. Leorio focused his aura in order to maintain Knuckle’s focus on his right hand. He split his nen and sent half of it to his left hand while maintaining the previous portal. With his aura split like it was, Leorio would be totally vulnerable if his gamble didn’t pay off.

Leorio jabbed the wall behind him again, his hands becoming bloodied and sore from repeatedly punching things he shouldn’t. He winked at his opponent as a second portal appeared, causing the first to melt into nothing. “I have two hands.”

Knuckle was experienced enough to notice the last hit, but a fraction too late to react to it. It landed square in his stomach and APR disappeared in a mist of sparkling lights. 

Knuckle bent over, no longer crowding Leorio. He worried for a second that he had gone too far when the other man fell on his rear in a fit of laughter.

“That was a good one,” Knuckle said once he regained his breath. He accepted Leorio’s outstretched hand this time and pulled himself off the ground. “The boss was right when he said you had promise.”

If Leorio hadn’t been so exerted he would have blushed. He looked over to Morel who also stood up with a grin on his face. “Indeed. No one who Knuckle has challenged has won in the first fight, but you’re becoming better at managing your aura and thinking on your feet.”

Morel reached for Leorio’s right hand. The blood hadn’t dried due to the repeated breaking of the skin and Morel's rough hands pulled away stained. “Next lesson we’re going to show you how to use your power without breaking your hands.”

Leorio nodded. “Looking forward to it.”

Knuckle wrapped an arm around Leorio, welding them together with sweat. “Let’s get some water and cool down, yeah?”

Leorio reciprocated the embrace, his heart refusing to slow. How long had it been since he had a hug? 

Knuckle grabbed the hand dangling just past his shoulder with more tendrness than Morel had. “And maybe some bandages while we’re at it.”

“Lead the way. I’ll buy, since I beat your ass so righteously.”

When Knuckle laughed Leorio felt the vibrations rumble in his own chest, kickstarting a laugh of his own. “Wait until next time. Now I know not to underestimate you.”

Arms slung over each other, they laughed their way out of the training room, leaving a fond teacher shaking his head behind.

  
  


**_i know i should walk away_ **

**_but i just want to let you break my brain_ **

**_and i can’t seem to get a grip_ **

**_no matter how i live with it_ **

Leorio had been right when he said that they wouldn’t run into each other at all when Kurapika stayed at the partment. In total Kurapika had stayed over three times, and from beginning to end, he’d never seen Leorio in his own apartment. 

There were signs of him having been there, a coffee cup left on the table, study materials and medical books strewn about. The desk and the couch looked like the only lived on surfaces in the whole apartment. The bedroom always looked untouched, the bed neatly and crisply made in a way that contradicted everything that Kurapika knew about Leorio. It was as if when he _was_ home, Leorio never slept.

Kurapika would say he was checking the entrances, which he also did, but if he let himself be honest, he wanted to know more. The desk was neat as well, medical work organized in a binder and under the desk resided a locked file box, presumably with Black Whale or similar Zodiac business.

Kurapika avoided looking to his right. The first night in the apartment, just seeing the framed picture sent him running, haunted by himself. It was one of the few things with personality in the apartment. All of the linens were shades of black and white, same with the couch and tables and countertops. Nothing _screamed_ Leorio.

Kurapika always slept on the couch, with the thin blanket thrown over the back. He never undressed, but he’d take off his shoes and leave them beside the couch. He rarely slept, and when he did his mind was riddled with nightmares. Kurapika tried to think about the last time he slept without a nightmare and quickly stopped when he realized something he wished he hadn’t. Throughout the Hunter Exam, he hadn’t had a single nightmare. Between managing Gon and a fledgling assassin, when he fell asleep someone always watched over him, usually the very man he tried to avoid now.

Kurpapika felt Leorio’s aura outside the door before he heard him. The lock clicked as a key slid in. Kurapika tensed from his position on the couch. 

The door opened and Leorio’s tall, lanky form became illuminated by the blue light filtering through the window. Leorio closed the door with a soft push.

“Holy shit,” Leorio whispered. Kurapika noticed his voice sounded raw and raspy, as though he’d been previously shouting. “I’m fucking dreaming.” 

Leorio answered a phone call, his face lit up by the glow of the screen. From underneath his hair Kurapika saw a scruffy shadow along Leorio’s jaw and dark blue scrubs with a white long-sleeved undershirt peeking out of the sleeves and neckline.

“Heya, Cheadle, miss me so bad already?” Leorio whispered, not knowing that Kurapika was awake and listening.

Kurapika trained his ears to try to hear Cheadle’s response to no avail.

“Yeah, I came home to get clothes to train in and a change of clothes for tomorrow’s shift and meeting.”

Again, Kurapika could only hear vague sounds coming from the phone’s speaker.

“No, I haven’t heard from him.” Leorio turned his back to Kurapika to head down the hall to his bedroom. 

Leorio’s voice subconsciously rose once he was out of the same room as Kurapika. “It’s not like that, and everyone seems to know enough for that to be clear. The meeting is tomorrow, so I’m sure he’ll be there.”

Cheadle must have been asking after Kurapika. He maintained a polite impression in Zodiac meetings so far, but had yet to respond to the group communications. However if there was a meeting, he made sure to go or contact Cheadle and Mizaistom directly.

Leorio paused for a minute, quiet. Kurapika lay still, but if Leorio was still walking around, he couldn’t hear or sense it. After a moment he answered, “Don’t worry about me, Cheadle, I’m a big boy. I’m not going to get distracted. Not that there is anything to distract me. I’m heading to HQ now.”

Leorio came out of his room changed into grey sweatpants and a plain t-shirt. He carried a duffel bag and set it gently on the floor by the door. He gathered the rest of his things, and quietly pulled his key ring out of his pocket. Leorio hesitated for only a moment, but he didn’t look back at Kurapika once. He closed the door as softly as he had before and the lock clicked back into place.

Kurapika remained still for a long time after that. Not including the first time, this had been the third time that Kurapika took Leorio up on his offer of using his apartment, and the first time he had seen Leorio home.

Kurapika, in the back of his mind, when he had to cave a little, wondered if Leorio avoided the apartment before and after meetings entirely, or if he really was just too busy to ever be home. He could see the irony in his mind’s wanderings, which is why he didn’t often let it stray.

With Leorio having come and gone so quickly, there was likely no chance that they’d cross again before Kurapika had intended to leave. The Zodiac meeting didn’t count as Kurapika tended to leave immediately and Leorio always had a shift at the hospital.

But Kurapika wasn’t an idiot. He knew that by taking Leorio up on his offer there was a possibility that they’d run into each other and end up having the conversation that he dreaded. He felt oddly warm despite the low temperature outside and the thermostat inside never being adjusted. His phone buzzed on the coffee table, not fully charged, but charged enough for him to make it where he needed to be.

The meeting was at noon tomorrow, but Kurapika couldnt sit still. Even if he got up, could he allow himself to linger alone in the apartment? 

Kurapika reached for his phone.

If it was Leorio, he’d leave. If it was Leorio, he might know what the conversation with Cheadle was about, or maybe what Leorio had been thinking.

If it was Leorio, maybe they could get the talking over with and then proceed without ever talking about it again.

The text was not from Leorio, but from an unsaved number that Kurapika recognized anyway.

**_Unsaved number 04:16_ **

_I know this is late, but the Intelligence team is getting together to go over some notes, nothing that can’t be covered in tomorrow’s meeting, but the invitation is extended to you as well._

**_Unsaved number 04:17_ **

_Perhaps we could try out what we discussed in the first meeting?_

Zodiac meetings were held at the Hunter Association Headquarters. Leorio had just left the hospital, so was that where he was headed also?

**_Contact saved: OX_ **

**_Kurapika 04:20_ **

_I can be there in roughly 30 or 45 minutes_

**_Kurapika 04:22_ **

_I am in town early for tomorrow’s meeting anyway._

**_OX 4:22_ **

_Interesting. The staff will let you know where to meet us. Caffeine is provided._

Kurapika threw off his blanket. What if Leorio was at HQ? He’d be training, maybe they wouldn’t cross paths.

The commute to the heart of the city took longer than Kurapika expected. The subway station nearest Leorio’s apartment had been shut down and Kurapika had to trek twenty minutes to the next one. Snow began to fall on his way and he turned his face up to feel the snowflakes fall.

Once he made it to HQ he had hardly made it into the lobby before he was greeted with the sight of Leorio, long legs bared in shorts that were frankly obscene. Kurapika could see a solid two inches of Leorio’s boxer briefs beneath the shorts. It reminded him of a scene from years prior, when he shared a hotel room with Leorio and the other caught him off guard by walking out of the shower completely naked.

Leorio hadn’t seen him yet, but Kurapika couldn’t draw his eyes away. Leorio’s whole body seemed slick with sweat, his hair pushed back from his forehead. Shamefully, Kurapika noticed the man beside Leorio only after Leorio’s voice broke through the fog in his mind.

“Hey Kurapika, I guess they got a hold of you after all.” Leorio smiled wide, like there had never been the barrier of time and danger between them, like he wasn't pretending like he hadn't seen Kurapika on the couch. The other man wore nothing more than a smile and sweatpants and Leorio's arm around his shoulders.

“They did, will you two be joining us?”

Leorio shook his head. “Nah, I’ve had a long day. Honestly I’m probably going to go back to Knuckle’s hotel and shower there. For the water pressure and shit. Maybe take a quick nap before the meeting.”

Then Leorio winced and turned to his friend. “Knuckle this is Kurapika, Kurapika this is Knuckle.”

The other man, Knuckle, smiled and nodded to Kurapika, making the lines under his eyes more pronounced. He looked equally as sweaty and unbothered.

Knuckle addressed Leorio, “I’m not waking you up or driving back for the meeting. I have to be on a flight in two hours.” 

“Rude. Just don't check out online while I'm in the shower or something.”

Kurapika watched the exchange until he couldn’t anymore. Part of him hoped Leorio _would_ be going to the same meeting, given the location. He couldn't shake the feeling that either he wasn't the only one trying to avoid the other, or that Leorio wasn't going back to his own place to let Kurapika know it was okay to go back.

“I have to go now.”

“Bye, Kurapika!” Leorio called out to his retreating back, oblivious to how close his facade was to cracking.

Kurapika raised his hand in a parting wave though he didn't look back. For the first time in a long time, he couldn’t file his feelings away. For every step he walked in the opposite direction, his mind flooded itself with words and images he never thought would see the light of day again.

In his mind’s eye Kurapika saw Leorio’s pure smile directed to the side. Where Kurapika used to imagine himself he saw the new, buff and friendly Knuckle. 

Kurapika hadn’t seen Leorio’s real smile since being back, and though he had done nothing to deserve that smile, his heart ached that it hadn’t been for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments, questions, et cetera make the creative process more rewarding. lemme know what you think!  
> the songs to denote pov changes are:  
> Rot - DBMK  
> Bishop's Knife Trick - Fall Out Boy  
> you can listen to my [leopika playlist here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=Ucl9TGuaToew7bUeOJO4Zw)


	4. Where Do You Go When I'm Not Thinking Of You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leorio spends quality time with a friend and Kurapika's resolve becomes thinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heya just some TW for a hospital setting and mentions of cancer. 99% sure the medical talk in here is hella incorrect, and you would think i could do a lil research because i spent an hour researching nen, but nah

**_i'm all alone and i just need some fucking friends_ **

**_Greek Theater's closed_ **

**_ain't got a thing to do_ **

**_i'm all alone and i just hit up all my friends_ **

The hospital had become overrun with patients due to the winter flu spread. Leorio had gone from a surgery where he helped stitch together someone that barely looked human after all they had been through; to taking temperatures and calculating dosages under Cheadle’s careful eye. She trusted him enough to not hover all the time and anything he could seriously fuck up she directly assisted with.

According to Cheadle and many of the other doctors and interns, Leorio apparently had an incredible bedside manner, leaving sick patients with smiles on their faces no matter the scenario. He had an appointment with a young patient and Cheadle said she would catch up soon, but that he could ask the usual questions and fill out paperwork in the meantime.

The kid in question had been crying silently under the watchful eye of his father. Leorio had passed the room a couple of times on his rounds, but as he popped in he wished he had checked on the patient sooner once he saw the mess of tears.

“Hello, I’m Leorio.” He pulled the curtain that separated the room from the others closed to give them privacy. “What seems to be the matter?”

The kid’s father, a burly man with a sour face, scoffed. “It's just a headache, he’s overreacting.”

Leorio gave the man a plastic smile and referenced his clipboard for the kid’s name. “Do you mind if I ask Kai some questions?”

“Knock yourself out.”

Leorio held back his commentary about his opinions on shitty fathers and turned back to the child in tears. “Do you feel okay enough to answer some questions for me, Kai?”

Kai nodded, long hair falling into his eyes.

“Good. Can you tell me where you're feeling pain?”

Kai pointed to the back of his head. Leorio nodded and pulled up a rolling stool so he didn’t tower over the child. “Good job. Can you tell me on a scale from one to ten how bad it hurts?”

Kai’s voice was small and garbled around snot when he spoke. “Um, maybe a seven?”

“No problem,” Leorio kept his voice as soothing as possible as he jotted that down on his paperwork. “Have you fallen down recently or maybe hit your head against something?”

“No.”

“Okay, how long have you been feeling this pain?”

Kai glanced hesitantly back at his father. “Um, since school started.”

Leorio nearly broke his pencil in half. It was late November. This kid had been in pain for four months. He set his clipboard down. “Can I use my hand to check the back of your head?”

Kai nodded. Leorio had him bend his head down and parted his hair with his fingers. He lightly ran his fingers along the back of the kid’s head, but found no bumps or lesions.

Leorio frowned. “I don’t feel anything.”

Kai sobbed audibly then, struggling to speak. “Its--its like---inside.”

“Inside your head?” Leorio wondered. It could be chronic migraines, but he couldn’t just send the upset kid home with some painkillers. It was clear to him that Kai’s father disregarded the pain, but Leorio’s heart constricted when he saw the boy’s face crumple.

Determined and careful, Leorio released nen from his fingertips. He rubbed the back of Kai’s head slowly, only for his nen to react to an obstruction. Leorio’s strangled heart begged for another answer and he searched the whole head, only to come back to the one spot where he felt an obstruction.

“I’ll leave that in the notes for the doctor, she should be here in just a moment.”

“You’re not even a doctor?” the dad asked. “Makes sense if you're taking the kid seriously.”

Leorio grit his teeth together, and flashed Kai his sugariest smile. “I’ll just go check on her, be right back.”

Leorio saw Cheadle down the hall and he rushed to her with a death grip on his clipboard.

“Okay, so this kid--first of all his dad’s a dick but don't worry, I didn’t say anything--but he’s complaining of a pain in his head that's been bothering him for four months.”

Cheadle had become used to Leorio’s urgency as he treated every patient like they were of utmost importance. She nodded and reached for the paperwork. “I see.”

“I remembered what you told me when I helped in that first surgery. You said you thought I could feel things that shouldn't be where they are.”

“I remember,” Cheadle said. “We were operating on a tumor and when I told you to use your nen, you said you felt an anomaly and we found another.”

“Right, so I did that just now and I think you should order a scan.”

Cheadle’s face turned grave. “Did you tell the family?”

“I didn’t want to scare the kid, he looks like he’s in a lot of pain. And the dad is a dick and doesn’t believe the kid and then told me it made sense that I believed the kid because I'm not a real doctor.”

Leorio took a deep breath to calm himself. He couldn’t help anyone if he panicked. He knew Cheadle would take him seriously, but she hated those who didn’t believe people in pain as much as Leorio hated shithead fathers. She scoffed and took his arm as they walked back to Kai’s room.

Cheadle informed the dumbstruck father that she had ordered an x-ray session and that they would possibly need to order a surgery as well. Leorio poured a pocketful of change into a nearby vending machine and unloaded his hoard on Kai who finally gave him a smile.

By the time the x-rays came back Leorio’s shift had just ended. He insisted on sticking around while Cheadle confirmed their suspicions. “It's incredibly small, but pushing against the brain causing it to swell. We caught it early enough to operate with minimal additional dangers. You just saved this kid, Leorio.”

Leorio sighed, relieved. Kai still had a surgery to go until he was _safe,_ and even then, he might suffer a lifetime with this ailment. But Leorio had done everything he could and in the end, Kai would be getting treated by professionals who not only believed in his pain, but would try everything they could to get him back on his feet. 

“I'm just doing my job.”

“You're right, and I don’t tell you as often as I should, but you’ve done great work, Leorio.” Cheadle left to allow him to clock out, but called out over her shoulder, “One day you’re going to revolutionize the medical world with that technique, keep it up.”

After his shift, Leorio had to meet Morel for a training lesson. Throughout the weeks that had passed Leorio’s training had become a mix of sparring and honing his nen. His Ken had become strong enough that Morel began pressing him harder in lessons. He sparred with whomever was in town long enough for Morel to convince them to give up a few hours of their time.

In addition, Morel found more uses for Leorio’s nen ability. Upon learning how Leorio used his ability in the hospital, Morel advised him to use it to scout the rooms adjacent to theirs. If he imagined his nen working like a sonar device, he could determine how many people were in a room and where they were, simply by placing his hand against a wall or door.

Every lesson ended with Leorio out of breath and drenched in sweat, but he recognized the changes in himself. For Leorio, controlling his emotions had been key to utilizing his nen. When he manipulated his emotions and used them to strengthen his aura, his attacks hit harder, his defense became solid, and his healing more potent.

After training, Morel briefed Leorio on the escape route for the voyage. Morel would be sailing alongside the Whale in his own ship and the Zodiacs were to board that ship after the original two week trip to continue on to the real Dark Continent. All other passengers would hopefully be able to sail back on the Whale from the island they _claimed_ was the Dark Continent, but the Hunter Association provided an additional passenger ship just in case. In the event that the Whale became compromised, Morel told him that the only confirmed passage to the upper decks could only be opened from the top floor.

Leorio finished with Morel around three-thirty, pondering the likelihood that they'd all be able to escape in an emergency. He was surprised when he realized it was still daylight outside. He actually had the rest of the day to himself. The weather was cold as he stepped outside, under dressed in his work out clothes. Snow had fallen the day before, but the hubbub of the city turned it black with dirt and pollution. 

Leorio rarely ever came across time to himself, for himself. Work had gone well, training had gone well. He felt accomplished. He was tired, but the kind of tired where he would make himself a drink and have a friendly chat.

His friends from his school had dropped him as quickly as he had transferred, but regular medical students didn’t usually have time either. He had tried to call a few times, the girl with the braids and glasses, and the guy he could get drunk and fuck around with. They had gotten together in Swardani once, a meeting cut short by Cheadle calling him in for an extra shift.

Leorio debated calling Gon, before he realized that it would still be the middle of a school day on Whale Island. Killua preferred to text and might be running from or fighting the rest of the Zoldycks anyway .

So he called Kurapika. Riding on a high, even if Kurapika didn’t answer, Leorio could shrug it off and still get drunk and order pizza.

The phone rang, and rang, and rang.

Leorio sighed, his breath forming a cloud in the air.

_The number you called is not available at this time and the mailbox is full. Please hang up and try again._

Of course.

Right above Kurapika’s name was _Knuckle._ Leorio pursed his lips as pushed the call button, not really knowing what to expect. They had hung out once or twice whenever Knuckle happened to be in the city, but they usually ran into each other at HQ.

_“Hey,”_ Knuckle yelled into the phone after only the 2nd ring. _“Ready for me to kick your ass again?”_

Leorio laughed, pushing aside his thoughts of Kurapika. “Please, no. I actually have the rest of the day off and I was wondering if you were around?”

_“Huh? Actually, yeah I am. We just got to HQ but the boss is dealing with Shoot’s assignment right now.”_

“You wanna come have a drink at my place? Shoot is obviously invited. I just left Morel, but I guess him too.”

Knuckle laughed. _“Shoot will be working, he just got cleared and he’s been itching to do something. But I’m definitely coming by, I technically don't even need to be here until tomorrow. Text me.”_

Leorio grinned, “Splendid. I’ve got the booze covered so just bring your ass.”

_“Man, I should have known you just wanted my body. Why my ass, aren’t my raging biceps good enough?”_

“Shut up dude,” Leorio blushed. “I’m hanging up.”

_“Rude.”_

Leorio hurried home, though the subway couldn’t hurry. He had stopped by the liquor store and grabbed a case of beer and some seasonal bourbon that the cashier pushed on him.

**_Knuckle 16:27_ **

_On my way with my ass AND my biceps >:3 _

**_Leorio 16:28_ **

_Bet <3 _

Leorio began to clean up, though his apartment was nowhere near dirty. He placed his used mugs in the dishwasher and cleared away the papers on the coffee table. He called in the pizza for delivery and showered quickly. He had decent water pressure here, and vowed to try to shower at home once more before he was stuck on a ship indefinitely.

An impatient knock at the door hurried Leorio along. He wrapped a towel around his neck and answered the door in only a pair of sweatpants, wet spots forming at the waistband.

Knuckle looked dressed down in a pair of joggers and concert sweatshirt from at least a decade ago. He had coiffed his hair, however.

“Come on and let me out of this damn cold,” Knuckle grumbled. Leorio stepped aside and allowed him in.

“I brought snacks,” Knuckle said. “I know Cheadle feeds you, so I didn't think you'd have anything."

Leorio pretended to be offended while he dried his torso and hair. "Cheadle doesn't always feed me. Besides, I ordered us some pizza.” 

“Good man." Knuckle tossed down his bag of convenience store goods and Leorio retreated to the kitchen to grab two beers out of the freezer. He popped the top on both before returning to the living room.

Knuckle pounded his beer as soon as it hit his hand.

“Woah dude, you good?" Leorio asked. He had barely taken a sip.

Knuckle shrugged. He looked different than any time Leorio had ever seen him. Training, Knuckle bared his upper body. Anywhere else, he wore a matching coat, shirt, and pants, all in white. 

Leorio thought he looked smaller without his usual ensemble.

“I thought the point was to hang out and get fucked up?”

Leorio pursed his lips as if in thought, before he tipped his bottle up and drank until it emptied.

"You know what, buddy, you're right. Let me grab a couple more."

Knuckle busied himself looking around the apartment. When Leorio arrived with the second round, he noticed that Knuckle had picked up the frame on the bookshelf.

“These are the only cold ones right now, so take it easy." Leorio passed Knuckle another beer.

“Gon and Killua look too sweet here to be as dangerous as they are,” Knuckle observed. He smiled at the photo, possibly remembering his time with the boys.

“Don’t they? Taking the hunter exam with them was never dull.”

Knuckle took a swig of beer. “Who’s the blonde? Your girlfriend?”

Leorio had already pressed his bottle to his lips, but didn't let it drop until it was empty. He avoided Knuckle's eyes.

“No. _He_ is not. He’s just--he’s our friend. He took the test with us.”

Knuckle nodded without a word and tenderly placed the frame back on the shelf. The pizza delivery person saved the mood, removing the tension from the room as they knocked. Leorio had paid online but grabbed cash for the tip. He didn't trust that the online tip option actually went to the driver. As he closed the door he saw that Knuckle had already located the beer and popped one for each of them.

If Leorio took up a lot of space, he and Knuckle together took up every bit of space that the couch had to offer. Their thighs pressed together, their elbows and shoulders rubbed with every gesture.

It was comfortable, the most physical contact he'd had with anyone in a long time. Leorio hadn't realized how much he missed hugs and rough housing and a good old pat on the back. If he tried to get a little closer, well they were already touching.

“What's been going on with you?” Leorio asked, because he felt the need to be an engaging host.

Knuckle shrugged with a slice of pizza hanging out of his mouth. “Been staying with Shoot while he recovers.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah," Knuckle paused and then jolted as if he just realized he'd been talking. "Anyway, besides that we’ve been following up with the aftermath of the chimera ants.”

“How’s that going?”

“Okay, for the most part. The hard part is that some ants remember their old selves, but can't assimilate back to their old homes. Some ants can’t remember anything, some just want to fuck shit up.”

Leorio munched on his pizza thoughtfully. He had heard a little about the chimera ants from Gon, but only briefly. Most of what he knew came from Zodiac meetings. “And you don’t figure out which one they are until you're dangerously close.”

“Yup.”

Leorio swallowed and chased the pizza with the rest of his beer. “I diagnosed a kid with cancer today.”

“That’s---grim.”

Cancer, what a bitch. Leorio thought about Kai, crying silently while suffering--while his father berated him. He thought about Pietro.

“Yeah, want some bourbon?”

“Fuck yes.” 

Leorio brought the bottle back to the table, cracking the seal with his thumb. "I don't even know if this is good shit, but I'm a sucker for peer pressure."

Leorio poured them each a glass and tasted it. Through the alcohol there were notes of brown sugar and cinnamon.

"Tastes like fucking candy to me," Knuckle said as he reached for the bottle. 

Leorio had to agree. They forewent the glasses and took to drinking straight out of the bottle. Leorio took out his phone and flipped to the camera. Knuckle struggled to take off his sweatshirt without ruining his hair, but he managed. When he settled Leorio had thrown an arm over his shoulders.

"Hey, we should take a selfie and send it to Gon and Killua." 

Knuckle drank from the bottle and passed it to Leorio. "Sure, you're the doctor man."

Leorio faltered with a giggle. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Knuckle leaned in as if to tell a secret. "I don't fucking know," he whispered.

Leorio's grin split his face in half. He began laughing so hard Knuckle had to move the bourbon out of reach. Knuckle tried to set the bottle on the table but part of his shirt had been trapped between a hysterical Leorio and the couch. Knuckle smacked his head into Leorio's as he leaned back.

Knuckle looked like he tried to glare but Leorio's laugh spread like fire, causing Knuckle himself to giggle, then bellow with laughter. Leorio couldn't hold back his own laughter as he pulled Knuckle close and snapped a picture. It had come out a little blurry, but Leorio almost didn't recognize himself. They looked like a pair of goofs.

Leorio dashed through his contacts as Knuckle tried to regain his breath. He selected Gon and Killua, but thought to send the picture to Morel as well, so he could see his students getting along. He finally clicked Knuckle's contact and hit _send_ before tossing his phone away.

Knuckle wiped tears of laughter from his eyes, but his face had sobered. “You know, about Shoot. Living with him has been like, the easiest thing ever but also real hard.”

Leorio supposed they had moved on from the "happy drunk" stage.

“Why is that?”

“Well, I don’t even think I used to like the guy, but over the ant thing he was like, a prime concern of mine, ya know?"

“Sorry but, didn’t he almost die?”

“Yeah, but even after, like when the doctors said he would definitely live. It's been a while, but here I am.”

“What's so wrong about it?”

Knuckle took a deep breath, then spoke fast. "Well, at first I thought it was PTSD. I hated leaving the room because I know what he looked like as he was dying. Then when he could get up and move I followed him around so much that he got upset with me. I apologized, we got over it, but since then, since he's walking and talking and doing--Shoot stuff I don't know--its been less like I'm worried he'll die on me and more like, eagerly waiting for him to get home so we can watch a stupid movie or something."

“Ah. You know the blond?”

“Yeah?”

“You actually met him the other day when we were leaving training.”

“Kurapika, right? Damn, he doesn’t look like the kid in the picture at all.”

“I know. He’s my buddy. You know, more like a buddy who I have more than buddy feelings for who hasn’t answered my calls in two years. Now he's in the Zodiacs too and I don't know how to act when he's around anymore."

“Well, fuck.” Knuckle passed the bottle back.

Leorio took a long drink. He's never admitted his "more than buddy" feelings towards Kurapika to anyone. Hell, he didn't even fully realize them himself until it was too late, until Kurapika was already too far gone.

“Does Shoot know how you feel?” Leorio asked.

Knuckle ducked his head. “It's not the kind of thing you just bring up.”

“Look, I don’t know Shoot half as well as I know you, but at least he talks to you. Whatever he’s upset about, even if you don't talk about _the_ thing, just let him know you care."

Knuckle squinted. “You’re actually really smart.”

Leorio laughed. “Things change. Shit happens.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re a fine, tall, doctor man, you got plenty going on for ya.” 

They finished off the bottle and sat, talking and laughing. Leorio noticed that when Knuckle laughed his eyes slipped closed, and his nose scrunched up, and his mouth was wide open. Leorio wonders if its because Knuckle is drunk, if it's his normal laugh, or if it's the carefree one he never shows.

Leorio realized he’d been looking at Knuckle for a long while.

Knuckle didn't seem to mind as he mirrored Leorio's position on the couch, one arm propping his head up. He had finally ditched the sweatshirt and wore a white tank top that gratuitously displayed his muscles.

“Your biceps _are_ really nice” Leorio said.

“I told ya.”

Knuckle, never one for subtlety, asked, "Can I kiss you?. I mean, I know I'm not Kurapika, and you’re not Shoot, but--”

Knuckle grinned shyly. “Just for tonight. We can be two sad, drunk guys making out tonight and tomorrow we can go back to being two sad guys who don't have a fucking clue what they're doing.”

Leorio scooted closer, if that was possible. Knuckle was attractive. Leorio noticed that much already. “Are you sure?”

“If you kiss me right now, will you feel any different about Kurapika?”

Leorio thought back to the past two years with no word, and how hard his heart beat every time he saw his friend. He thought about late nights spent together, of shared rooms, whispered stories and vulnerability. 

“Not at all.”

“Right, and I won’t feel any differently about Shoot.”

“Let's do it, then.”

Knuckle’s left hand rested on Leorio’s hip where his sweatpants dipped. He looked into Leorio's eyes as he leaned in for a kiss, eyes only closing as their mouths met. Leorio hadn't expected Knuckle to kiss so softly. 

Leorio responded with his right hand on Knuckle’s defined forearm, pressing back into the kiss. Leorio, hungering for affection, ran his fingers up Knuckle's arm, over his shoulders, and down his torso. 

Knuckle pulled away from the kiss, licking his lips, eyes unfocused. “See? No harm done."

"Then can we do it again?" Leorio asked, distracted.

Knuckle's answer was to kiss him again, his own hand traveling to Leorio's jaw which he held so carefully in his palm. Leorio curled his fingers in the thin shirt Knuckle wore.

In the few times Leorio had kissed someone before, he'd never been handled like glass. Was it because Knuckle knew his true feelings didn't lie with him? Was it because Knuckle himself wanted someone else?

Whatever the reason, Knuckle held him close, but not in a grip Leorio couldn't break. The kiss or rather _kisses_ lasted late into the night. Always gentle, slow.

Knuckle yawned in the middle of a kiss and Leorio chuckled. "Let's go to bed, yeah? We can head out together in the morning."

"Sounds good.”

Leorio showed Knuckle to the bedroom but Knuckle dragged him with. Knuckle fell into the mattress with little grace and Leorio wondered as he peeled back the blankets when he slept there last. 

Knuckle's snoring filled the room soon. Leorio was usually so exhausted that his brain shut down. This was the first time he had gone to bed when he should. Knuckle turned around and pressed his forehead to Leorio’s spine just between his shoulders, breath light on his back.

Leorio leaned into the touch with a sigh.

"Thanks , Knuckle."

**_it's the good advice that you just didn't take_ **

**_and who would've thought, it figures_ **

November brought snow and a lack of Zodiac meetings. Kurapika used the free time to organize a group of people to take along on the voyage. Melody and Basho were among the first to join. After some consideration Kurapika had dug out an old business card he had been given at the end of the hunter exam and invited Hanzo, a ninja and fellow hunter.

After even more consideration and a rare glass of wine Kurapika dialed the number of someone else he had been in the hunter exam with. Killua Zoldyck’s voice crackled through the receiver as he explained that he couldn’t help.

_“I’m travelling with my sister, kind of trying to avoid being assassinated. Why don’t you try Leorio?”_

Kurapika sighed. His head began to throb in the early hours of the morning and the glass of wine he had didn’t offer him any relief. “Leorio can’t help with this, I need someone of a certain--skill set and caliber.”

Killua was silent for a moment in which Kurapika could hear faint traffic sounds and the voice of a young girl in the background. 

_“Well, beggars can’t be choosers and I’m sure Leorio wouldn’t hesitate. Regardless, I have someone other than the old man in mind. I’ll try to contact her and give her your information. Piece of advice? No matter how disgusting it may be, you should compliment her looks and youthfulness to get her on your side. She’s actually old as balls.”_

Kurapika thanked the boy before hanging up. He hadn’t wanted to get Killua involved, not truly, but he was powerful beyond belief. Kurapika needed the best for this mission. He couldn’t--wouldn’t--fail this time.

The very last person that Kurapika contacted was his former mentor, a wise man whose advice he could never take.

Kurapika spent his time putting his affairs in order for the trip. He had squared away rent for his bar and various other bills, as well as ensuring that the room in the back would remain undisturbed. He had to put someone in charge, but when he had to take both Melody and Basho that became easier said than done.

Melody, who sat on the other side of his desk typing up a report, tried for the third time to start a conversation. “How are the Zodiacs treating you?”

Kurapika rubbed his ailing temples. “So far I’ve been impressed, but I'm not sure why Cheadle would accept me so willingly.”

“Well, she and Leorio are close. I’m sure she trusts him a lot. Have you seen him recently?”

“I’ve seen plenty,” Kurapika said.

Melody hummed as she typed. “He and I talked quite a bit after the election, you know.”

Kurapika drowned the urge to hide his face in his hands with another swallow of wine. “Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because you didn’t want to hear it before.”

That much was true. Melody tried to update him on his friend’s status whenever she saw Leorio. Whether she ran into him on a job or back during the election, Melody always had a story to tell, no matter how long or short their interaction had been.

“And because I also consider him a friend and I think if the two of you simply talked you would both feel better.“

Kurapika didn’t want to think about that. He didn’t want to think about Leorio. Not his voice, or his face, or that Melody's words suggested he wasn't well, or the way he beckoned Kurapika from the precipice of nothing that he’d become so acquainted with.

Kurapika didn’t want to think about the light in Leorio’s eyes, didn’t want to think about the possibility that the very light he didn’t want to see could fade.

Kurapika didn’t want to know what Leorio would say if he knew all of the things that the blond kept close to his chest.

The humming started again, yet Melody never looked up from her report. Kurapika suspected she heard something troubling in his heartbeat, but that had become commonplace.

At that moment Kurapika’s phone buzzed with a notification. As if he knew that he was being talked about, Leorio’s name flashed across the screen. He called earlier, but like always Kurapika watched it ring.

Normally, Kurapika felt only an emptiness when Leorio called, but having seen him recently kicked up all of the emotions that Kurapika pretended he no longer had.

Melody perked up, eyes bright as she looked between Kurapika and the phone. He sighed and opened the notification to find a photo rather than a message. In the photo Leorio had his arm wrapped around Knuckle, the man he’d been with the last time Kurapika had seen him. They looked cozy with the backdrop of Leorio’s apartment putting their positions in perspective.

Kurapika scanned the photo for anything relevant to him, but instead he found a bottle of bourbon in Knuckle’s hand and a radiant smile on Leorio’s lips that threatened to chip away at Kurapika’s boundaries. He turned the phone around to show Melody, who looked pleased that the two in the image seemed to be having fun.

Kurapika put the phone down without replying. He didn’t have to look up to know Melody had a frown on her face. She gathered her things with a sigh and before she left, offered Kurapika a bit of unsolicited advice.

“You and Leorio are people I don’t want to see get hurt, and if you keep pushing him away, that’s all that will happen. He has the kindest heart I’ve ever heard, and yours isn’t as frozen as you believe. You should talk to him, in case you run out of time.”

As Melody left Kurapika in the wreckage of the bomb she just dropped, he downed the remainder of his glass. He left the phone on the desk as he rose to pour another. He didn’t need it, not when he could see Leorio in his mind’s eye.

Melody was right. He was in serious danger of running out of time to make amends with his old friend, but that was precisely why he couldn’t. Until the Phantom Troupe paid for what they did to his clan, until he retrieved the rest of the Scarlet Eyes, Kurapika’s life wasn’t his own. It belonged to the past, to those who no longer had one. His life was just one more tool to utilize to achieve his goal.

Snow drifted outside the window to Kurapika’s office. With a fresh glass of wine and an amalgam of feelings he watched the precipitation.

In the long run, Leorio would be better off if he never spoke to Kurapika again. Kurapika tried to smile at the thought that Leorio never knew what was best for him, that Leorio would always think of others before himself, but the reflection in the glass of the window looked hollow anyway.

Kurapika raised his wineglass to his friend miles away, to a future he couldn’t see any longer, to hope--which he wasn’t brave enough to feel except in micro doses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lemme know what you think! comments, kudos, keysmashes, and cursing is always appreciated  
> the songs to denote poc changes are:  
> Friends - Chapel  
> Ironic - Alanis Morrisette  
> you can listen to my [ leopika playlist here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=6XiNiat0RHOzQUWhbyYYGA)!


	5. White Flag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the better before the worse ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kurapika's pov in the last chapter was pretty short so he has more time in this one.

**** **_you're my figure eight, yeah my best friend_ **

**_can't we spend the night like we used to outside your head_ **

**_and it's moving to the beat now_ **

**_but it cost you everything you had inside this empty house_ **

The king of all migraines paraded through Leorio’s skull. It had become so intense that Leorio nearly had Cheadle find a replacement for the second half of his shift. He stayed, only to have Cheadle rope him into picking Kurapika up from a small suburb outside of Swardani. The drive would be two hours out of the city and Leorio’s temples throbbed at the thought.

Nevertheless, he was a good little errand boy and despite everything, would never back out of the opportunity to see his old friend.

As Leorio left the Zodiac gathering that directly followed his shift, Saiyu joked about Kurapika being his boyfriend, a joke that got old the first time he told it. Honestly, Leorio tired of the same boring commentary. He snagged his coat from the rack by the door and stalked out of the room. Pyon called after him, but didn’t follow. 

Leorio didn’t have a problem picking up Kurapika, didn’t have a problem with Kurapika. He had a problem with smartasses that couldn’t learn to read a room. Especially when the subject matter hit too close to home.

As Leorio entered the parking garage he heard the faint _clicking_ of heels on pavement behind him. He stopped to allow his boss and her short legs to catch up with him.

“If it’s too much for you I can send a taxi, or someone else.” Cheadle respected Leorio enough to give him space, but cared enough to know that something other than a migraine had been bothering him.

“I’m fine, honestly. Saiyu and Kanzai are getting under my skin, that’s all.”

Cheadle slowly walked to where she could see Leorio’s face. He noticed that she looked concerned. “I didn’t know about Kanzai, but I’ll have a conversation with everyone. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Leorio sighed. ”It’s just a migraine for the most part. I can handle it.”

Cheadle _tsked_ and rummaged in her dress pockets for a bottle of painkillers that Leorio knew she always kept on hand. She passed it to him when she found it.

“You know you could fix that migraine easily if you hadn’t put a condition on your other nen ability.”

During Leorio’s time in the hospital, Cheadle showed him how to adapt his remote punch in a medical sense. Similar to how he could find tumors and locate broken bones, if he infused his nen with his medical training, he could manipulate the waves of his nen to target small aches and pains. Cheadle had told him about conditions when he asked if there was any way that he could use his ability to heal instead of simply acting as a painkiller substitute.

In order to be able to heal others at full power as long as he had a drop of nen left, Leorio swore to never use that ability on himself. And thus, a new nen ability had been born.

“I think the pros outweigh the cons on that one, Cheadle. Thanks by the way.” Leorio tossed her the bottle of painkillers and moved toward her car before being stopped again. Cheadle had gone from being the caring mentor to the sarcastic friend as she held her keys on her finger.

“Going somewhere?”

Leorio rolled his eyes, though he now sported a small smile. As he finally made it to Cheadle’s miniscule convertible his phone _pinged_ with a new notification.

**_Gon 19:22_ **

_Hey Aunt Mito is making me do chores but I’ll call right after I’m done!_

Leorio smiled at the screen. Gon’s enthusiasm was as effective as any painkiller and Leorio’s mind temporarily cleared of pain and exhaustion as he thought about what he would tell Gon when the kid called.

**_i like you inconveniently_ **

**_you're squeezing out my dopamine_ **

**_yeah, you like me in spite of me_ **

**_i feel these feelings quietly_ **

  
  


Kurapika hadn’t dressed for the winter weather in black slacks and a white button up, no jacket, no tie.

Leorio pulled up to the curb in Cheadle’s car, and rolled down the window. He was dressed in scrubs again with an uncharacteristic furrow to his brows. Kurapika thought of how happy he looked in the photo he sent. He thought about what Melody had said to him the other night.

“Hello, Leorio.”

“Kurapika.”

The blond slid into the car and buckled his seatbelt. The radio played quietly on a random station. It might have served to keep Leorio awake as he looked more drained than Kurapika had ever seen him. The longer it took Leorio to instigate a conversation, Kurapika thought that maybe the music was to fill the inevitable silence.

“If you’re tired, I can drive back.” Kurapika offered the only form of affection he could show the man beside him, and Leorio laughed.

It was the first positive expression on the taller man’s face, and the most Kurapika had seen him laugh in the past couple months. He showed all of his teeth and tongue as he laughed, and some of the apparent exhaustion cleared from his face.

“Full offense, Pika, but you always drive like a bat out of hell.”

Kurapika’s nose wrinkled. He hadn’t heard the offending nickname in some time. Leorio was the only one to ever call him that, and it grated his nerves, which he pointed out. Leorio’s grin dropped to something resembling his previous expression.

“I know.”

Silence filled the car again, oppressive and stifling. Kurapika usually wouldn’t mind the quiet, but coming from Leorio it signified a storm brewing. All they could do was wait for the clouds to break.

Leorio went a record fifteen minutes without saying a word before he poked the tension with a needle, “Gon’s probably going to call on the way back.”

“Remember, you’re not supposed to tell anyone the details of the voyage.” Kurapika said. He hadn't meant it as a jab, but that didn't matter as he felt the tension rise.

Leorio gripped the steering wheel so tight that Kurapika actually worried about it’s durability. “I talk to Gon about things other than work. And he doesn’t know anything about the mission. I’m not a fucking idiot.”

Kurapika knew he misstepped, but there was nowhere to go but down into the hole he dug for himself.

“I was just mentioning it, in case you need an excuse to talk to him, too.”

Kurapika snapped, then. Leorio’s best skill had to be digging underneath his skin and barriers. “Don’t act like you understand what’s going on when you have no clue.”

Leorio remained quiet for a long time after that, up until he pulled into a gas station about halfway through the trip.

“I have to piss and I’m taking the keys in case you decide to up and leave me here. If anything happens to this car I’m toast.”

Kurapika closed his eyes as the driver’s side door slammed shut and breathed deep. Leorio’s effect on Kurapika was not new. He could simultaneously enrage and comfort him. Part of Kurapika’s damaged heart soothed at the mere sight of his friend, but the soothing came with new risks and aches, and caused the old aches to intensify.

Kurapika preferred not to feel anything, other than rage.

And then there was Leorio, who felt everything for everyone all at once. Leorio, who had consoled Kurapika about his clan several times. Leorio, who cared about a pair of teenagers he’d barely met with such vivacity. Leorio, who just wanted to heal the broken.

Kurapika was genuinely afraid his pieces were beyond repair.

Leorio returned and leaned against the car to pump gas. He tossed a bag of snacks and energy drinks at the passenger seat when he re-entered and Kurapika set it on the center console.

As Leorio drove he didn’t say a word until his phone lit the interior of the car with an incoming call. “Can you answer that for me?”

Kurapika reached for the phone to see Gon’s excited smile on the caller ID. “I’ve seen you talk and drive before.”

“Yeah, and now I’m balls to the wall exhausted. Just put it on speaker, you don't even have to talk to him.”

Kurapika took the jab in silence as he answered.

_“Leeeeeorioooooo. Hey is it a good time to call? You said when you got home from the hospital, you’re not busy, right?”_

Leorio laughed. “Hey kid, technically I’m still kind of working, plans changed. Good news is that I can still talk.”

_“Great! What are you doing?”_

Kurapika had missed the excited energy that Gon added to a room. The brightness. He held the phone between himself and Leorio without complaint.

“Driving, I had to drive two hours away and now I’m driving back. What did you wanna talk about?”

_“Oh, well you really inspired me to pick up my training again so I had aunt Mito help me put together a schedule so I can work around school.”_

“Don’t go too hard too fast, this time.” Leorio warned

_“I’m not gonna break old man.”_

Leorio smirked. “Have you talked to Killua lately, Gon?”

Gon laughed _“Oh yeah! That was the other thing, Killua called me last night and he wanted me to tell you that he and Alluka and Nanika are doing good. And he said that he’s glad you’re finally picking up some of the slack._ _You know Killua so that just means he's super proud of you too!”_

Leorio glanced at Kurapika as Gon spoke, nodding to the phone with his head. He sighed and caved.

“Hello, Gon.”

_“Kurapika! Leorio didn’t tell me that you were going to be on the call! How have you been?”_

“Busy. How’s school?”

_“Boring! I have to sit in the same seat for eight hours, can you believe it?”_

“I’m sure you’ll be just fine.”

Leorio took over when Kurapika had run out of single syllable words and he and Gon spoke all the way to Leorio’s apartment and though Kurapika’s arm was tired from holding the phone, he never put it down. With every word he felt as though his heart was being constricted.

They bid Gon a farewell and Leorio led the way through a snowy courtyard that Kurapika had become familiar with. Leorio unlocked his door and the temperature inside mimicked the frigidity outside. Leorio flipped the lights on. Kurapika hadn’t ever been in the apartment with the intention of being there at the same time as Leorio, so he wasn’t sure where he was supposed to go. He migrated to the only part of the house that felt like neutral territory, the couch.

Leorio wandered the house for a moment, picking up the minimal mess that he’d left last time. Kurapika recognized the bottle of bourbon on the coffee table, though it had less than a swallow in it. Leorio picked it up no sooner than Kurapika had noticed it. 

“I’m taking a shower,” Leorio said without slowing down after cleaning.

Kurapika busied himself with the stitching on the couch. By the time he counted over a hundred stitches, the sound of the shower ceased and Leorio re-emerged, his bare chest bright red and wet. He carried his towel as he dried his hair, sweatpants haphazard on his hips.

Leorio said nothing as he rifled through the kitchen pantry. Kurapika didn’t dare to peek around the corner to investigate. By the time he counted another fifty-five stitches Leorio stood in front of him with a bowl, it’s contents steaming pleasantly in the chill.

“I didn’t ask,” Kurapika said as he looked up.

“I know.”

Leorio set the bowl on the arm of the couch that Kurapika used as a distraction. The noodles and broth inside nearly spilled and Kurapika had no choice but to grab it.

“Is that all you say now?”

“What else can I say to you?” Leorio asked. “You’re not dumb.”

“Humor me.” Kurapika caved and sipped the broth. It was good, but mostly he appreciated the warmth. Leorio had chosen to sit on the floor across from the couch. He frowned, noodles hanging out of his mouth.

“It's been two years with no contact. No calls, no replies, hell, it doesn’t even seem like you read any of them or listened to anything of the voicemails.”

“That was the point.”

Leorio closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose. Kurapika knew the truth would hurt him, but the whole truth would be much worse.

When Leorio opened his eyes, his voice became more vulnerable. “You left and just went off the grid. I hate to be that guy, but _everybody_ came for Gon. If they didn’t, they stayed to see him get better, to pray or try to help in any way they could. And I couldn’t even get a hold of you. Melody couldn’t even give me answers.”

Leorio looked down at his food and pushed it away. The bowl scraped against the table, leaving small scratches on the wooden coffee table.

“I--I had no idea what to do. Of course I didn't, I’m not a genius. The nen exorcist _ran_ from him. If Killua’s sister hadn’t been a literal angel miracle worker, Gon wouldn’t be here right now.”

Kurapika opened his mouth, but Leorio cut him off. He supposed he deserved the tirade--he _had_ asked for it after all.

“Before that? When I needed someone to talk to? When there were things I didn’t think I should unload on literal children? When I missed you so bad I fucking _begged_?”

Leorio’s voice cracked and he took a moment to compose himself. When he spoke again his words lacked the heat from before.

“Look, you don’t want anything to do with me? Tough shit. I’m sorry I care about you, Kurapika, I really am. I’m sorry my feelings are fucking up your plans to be a badass. I’m sorry I miss you, and that I worry constantly if you’re dead.”

“I know there’s only one thing on your mind right now, and I just happened to be in a position to possibly help. I didn’t even know if I had useful information, or if it was something you had figured out already, or--”

Kurapika interrupted, because he wouldn’t be on the last leg of his journey if it wasn’t for Leorio. He might have never found the rest of the eyes without him. “They’re the last, Leorio. The last ones left.”

“Oh! Oh.” Leorio had gone from elated to sad in less than a second. Kurapika wondered how he coped with all of those emotions roiling like a volatile ocean inside of him.

“So you’re going to do whatever it takes, huh? Just like Gon, did.”

Kurapika took another sip of his soup. “Maybe.”

“So that’s why--”

“Leave it, Leorio.”

When Kurapika looked up again, Leorio gritted his teeth together and stared blindly at the table in front of him with a sneer. His hands trembled and he closed them into fists to stop the shaking. After a few moments Leorio sighed and laid his hands flat, though his jaw remained clenched.

“Can I make a closing argument, and then you can avoid me to your heart’s content?”

“No.” Kurapika didn’t know which part he objected to.

Leorio disregarded his answer anyway, “I missed you the whole time. You can’t be forgotten as easily as you think. Or hated. Because no matter how angry I may have been, or sad, or petty, I just wanted to talk to you. Regardless of whether you believe it, or push it out of your memory, I will always be here. Maybe I am weak, and useless, and I just got lucky, but I am always here for you.”

Leorio stood up then, and carried his full bowl back to the kitchen. Kurapika reflected on what Leorio had said, struggling with his own truth and protecting the other man. There had never been a doubt about how much Leorio cared, but Kurapika couldn’t help but wish he didn’t. It made what he had to do that much harder.

“Leorio?”

“What?” There was no venom in Leorio’s voice, just exhaustion. Kurapika wished he hadn’t contributed to the long day he was sure Leorio had prior to picking him up.

“I don’t think you’re weak _or_ useless. I know I hurt you, but the closer you get to me the more you can get hurt, so there is no other way, and I’m sorry but I won’t say more.”

“Kurapika.”

“What?”

“I’m gonna hug you okay?”

Without waiting for an answer, Leorio reached for Kurapika and held him tight. A moment passed before Kurapika allowed himself to reciprocate. He kept his eyes shut tight as he felt tears prickling his eyes. Leorio took another deep breath and held it in his chest, as if he also fought back something similar. Leorio rested his chin on top of Kurapika’s head and he could feel the permafrost covering his heart melt. 

The microwave beeped and Leorio squeezed once before he pulled away. Kurapika ducked his head and cleared his throat to avoid meeting Leorio’s eyes.

“Sorry my place isn’t exactly cozy, I’m really not usually here for long. ”

“I noticed. How often are you working and training?” Kurapika asked. He could do this. At least for now. At least until he had to truly leave leorio again, and hurt them both, he could try.

Leorio laughed and it shot through Kurapika like a knife. “Well, between the hospital and the Zodiac stuff, I don’t really ever have a day off. Sometimes I do both and still have to do training across town.”

Dangerously, Kurapika let his heart drown in a puddle of thawed armor. Leorio brought back his food, steaming from the microwave, and Kurapika decided to do the same to the remainder of his own noodles. 

Leorio used the opportunity to set up the couch with a pillow and an additional blanket that Kurapika hadn’t seen before. “I usually sleep out here anyway,” Leorio explained. “It’s just easier to get up and go, you know?”

Kurapika knew. He stood while he finished his food so he didn’t mess up the impromptu bed.

“You can have the room, I promise the bed is really comfortable.” 

The pair finished their food in silence, but it was much different from the silence in the car. Leorio drained his bowl and washed it before he laid down to bed. Kurapika took that as a sign that he should call it a night as well.

Time passed slowly in Leorio’s bedroom. The bed was indeed comfortable, which is why Kurapika sat on the floor with his back to the wall. If he strained his ears he could make out the faint sound of Leorio snoring on the couch.

Kurapika used the time to steel his emotions again. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t freeze his walls back into place. Leorio had done what he usually did and broke through every boundary Kurapika had set for himself. The worst part was that he allowed it to happen.

Though they were only human, Kurapika couldn’t help but chastise himself for getting close again. There was hardly any time until the voyage, at which point they likely wouldn’t see each other due to the layout of the ship itself. 

Kurapika only had to make it until then, but in the darkness of the room his vulnerable heart wept at the mere thought of leaving the embrace of Leorio’s companionship yet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me what ya think! comments, kudos, bookmarks, keysmashes, et cetera are always appreciated!  
> the songs to denote pov changes are:  
> Figure Eight - Trophy Eyes  
> High Definition - Waterparks  
> you can listen to my [leopika playlist here!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=8lcl8Pi3SmSwNvMZOL9fiw)


	6. Enter The Black Whale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The voyage begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me start off by saying my bad. the holidays were a weird time for me, but I'm definitely finishing this! that said, this chapter is being posted as soon as I finish so it probably wont be the best.
> 
> I want to credit and give a MAJOR shout out and some thanks to two AMAZING WONDERFUL ARTISTS who drew fanart from some previous chapters. 
> 
> AO3 handle HeyItsHAE created [ THIS MASTERPIECE OML ](https://twitter.com/HeyHaleyHAE/status/1344324664928002048?s=20)
> 
> AND AO3 handle LadySatsuki created [ THIS BEAUTIFUL ART WTF ](https://twitter.com/joestarryeyed/status/1343374210236903426?s=19)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!
> 
> As far as notes for the story from here on out: the timeline around the voyage is whack and of course we have no idea how canon will/would go so I'm just having fun with it now and doing what I want.
> 
> Also TW for blood mentions and graphic nightmares it happens in kurapika's 2nd pov and is in all italics if ya wanna skip that

**_To you, do I seem stuck inside a dream?_ **

**_Inside a broken, hallowed-out machine_ **

The time had finally come for the voyage to the Dark Continent. The world as most people knew it resided within a lake inside a much larger, more dangerous mass of land. Ancient runes and relics spoke of the ancestors to the human race and their journey from the Dark Continent to the Known World. 

The Known World fell to disaster each time humanity ventured to the Dark Continent and thus a treaty had been formed to prevent such a trip. Even so, nearly a hundred and fifty unsanctioned voyages proceeded, with the average survival rate of 0.04%.

As Leorio understood it, there was a very real possibility that he wouldn’t make it back alive. Though that was a risk he had to take, for the late Chairman requested that the Zodiacs overshadow his son, Beyond, and return from the Dark Continent with _hope_.

Beyond Netero had already made an excursion to the Dark Continent and was among the only survivors. Simultaneously, the V5--the five united nations of the Known World--tasked the Hunter Association with making sure that Beyond could not claim ownership of any discovery made on the Dark Continent.

What that meant to Leorio, was that he was in way over his head.

Early on the morning of the voyage the final Zodiac meeting had been cancelled due to the sheer size of everyone’s workload. Leorio had slept his typical four hours in the barracks at HQ, his bags packed and loaded up with the rest of the medical unit’s supplies.

Many hunters had joined the expedition, whether as individually interested parties or as bodyguards to the elite, Kurapika being among the latter. With the final meeting being cancelled, Leorio hadn’t seen the blond since that night in his apartment. Kurapika struggled with himself, of that much Leorio was certain. All he could do now was hope that Kurapika found what he was looking for and peace to go with it.

Leorio couldn’t afford the time for distractions, not even the gorgeous-enigmatic-best-friend kind. He had to transport supplies and equipment to the medical ward on the third floor of the ship.

Ultimately the Black Whale had been constructed to keep the passengers on their designated floors. The first two floors belonged to the King of Kakin, Nasubi Hui Gou Rou, and the fourteen princes. The lower three floors belonged to three separate mafia families. The Heil-Ly controlled the third floor and reportedly negotiated deals with the upper floors, The Xi-Yu controlled the fourth floor, and the Char-R oversaw the fifth.

Bribes could be placed in order to travel between the three floors in order to appease the mafia, or an official application could be put in through the judicial court. The Zodiacs themselves were dispersed through the third floor for the most part.

No sooner than the medical ward had been set up, people flooded inside. Cheadle barked orders from the reception desk and Leorio did his best to stock the right shelves with the right medicines and take information from those in the waiting area. Hours before the ship even departed, Leorio had been rushing to organize supplies and see patients.

When Leorio finished one task, another filled its place. The only thing that managed to stop him all morning had been the panicked, familiar voice that broadcast over the speakers throughout the ship. The overhead speaker _clicked_ and Kurapika’s tinny voice echoed through every deck. He called for responses from his team and then the speakers went dead. 

The third floor medical ward began humming about _nen_ , and _nen beasts_ , and _what the fuck_ was going on in the upper floors.

Leorio faltered at the sound of his friend’s voice, but began moving again before Cheadle had the time to scold him. He wondered through his entire shift about what the broadcast meant. If this was a usual shift Cheadle would have answered all of his questions no matter how irrelevant. But this was worse than anything Leorio imagined. More people swarmed the ward with injuries after the announcement until the medical

ward felt like a swimming pool full of jelly, and every movement warranted twice the effort.

Leorio checked his wristwatch. It read ten-thirty. The ship had barely left the dock, yet Leorio felt the beginnings of frustration and exhaustion creep up on him. He’d been awake and working without a break since two in the morning. A patient nearly as tall as Leorio bumped into him, but when Leorio nearly snapped on the guy, he ran, leaving Leorio with only the impression of vanishing teal hair.

Leorio shook himself off and patient after patient, prescription after prescription, the waiting room thinned out. By noon Cheadle had been able to start sending people to their breaks and lunches. By the time Leorio’s break came along, he could feel a headache pounding and echoing in his throat and temples. 

A pot of coffee had been put on, but Leorio could smell that it had burnt. Nevertheless, he drank the acrid liquid because he didn’t have enough time to make another. Not even five minutes into his break, Gel stalked in and laid her head on the table, black hair splaying out.

“I’d ask if you’re okay, but I just realized how stupid that question is. Coffee?”

Gel reached a hand out and snatched Leorio’s mug. He had been offering to make her a cup of her own, but he couldn’t blame her. He patted her shoulder and made for the counter to make himself a second cup.

Gel pounded the drink and screwed her face in a wince. “Is there any sugar in this?”

Leorio grunted _no_. “Didn’t want to waste time looking for it.”

If Gel and Leorio were both on break, then Cheadle must be running the floor solo. As if she sensed Leorio’s train of thought Gel offered, “I would have waited my turn for a rest but I nearly re-broke a soldier's leg that I had just set.”

“What happened?”

She shrugged, but Leorio could see his exhaustion reflected in her. “He was being belligerent, nothing new.”

Leorio bristled at the thought of someone taking their frustration on his coworker, deeming it unfair that half of the people she treated turned tail to talk shit about the _woman doctor._ Gel had saved so many ungrateful bastards, and still had to put up with the stigma.

“I see,” Leorio said. He didn’t know what else he _could_ say _,_ but Gel hadn’t been fishing for sympathy so they shared a cup of coffee in silence, each trying to gather their bearings for the next round. It wasn't definite when they would get another break or even get to sleep. All too soon, Leorio’s break ended and he left his washed cup by the coffee pot for the next poor soul who followed him.

“Hey, Gel?” he called as he prepared to go back.

The snake-like woman raised her head and pushed her black hair aside. She cocked a thin eyebrow at him.

He cleared his throat, hand on the back of his neck. “Do you know anything about those nen beasts? From the announcement?”

Gel nodded, her face devoid of any emotion. “My sympathies go out to our Rat, but I have a feeling we will all have a taste of all of the chaos quite soon. Talk to the boss before you leave.”

Leorio closed the door behind him, lost in thought. Cheadle forcing a clipboard into his hands brought him back to the scene. She rambled an apology as she had been called out of the medical ward. “When Gel gets back the two of you tag team it. I also need a thorough report on everything that happened and everyone who gets treated.”

She ran off without another word and Leorio began furiously flipping through the clipboard. A spike of panic rose in his chest, but after collaborating with Gel and the other doctors in the ward, a plan blossomed and the next wave of doctors, surgeons, and nurses were allowed to take a rest.

In such a short time Leorio had gone from a simple underling to Cheadle’s right hand man. He doubted himself, because no matter what he accomplished he’d _always_ be the med school dropout, he’d _always_ be the guy who couldn’t save his friends. 

Yet he trusted Cheadle, her intelligence, her experience. And if _she_ trusted _him_ to do something he would suck up his negativity and persevere. His resolve to never let down the people who counted on him again shone brighter than any damp darkness he could fall into.

After the rush died down, Cheadle made her reappearance. The state of the ward seemed to ease the tension Leorio could see in her shoulders, but her frown deepened as she waved him towards her office. With the door closed the smell of antiseptic products increased tenfold.

Cheadle pinched her nose, silent for a while. When she had her thoughts in order, she spoke with a sigh. “So, about the Rat’s message.”

The mere mention of Kurapika sped up the pulse in Leorio’s throat, a quick _thumpthumpthump_ that nearly sent a shiver down his spine.

Cheadle continued, unaware of the depth of Leorio’s interest. “Each person who underwent the egg ceremony at the beginning was bestowed with a nen guardian. Presumably to _help_ the succession war. Nen beasts cannot attack another nen beast or the person the beast is attached to.”

Leorio hummed. His headache had yet to subside and the plethora of new information rattled the fragile inside of his skull. The ceremony Cheadle spoke of was for the royalty, something neither of them had witnessed. 

“But if the beasts can’t attack each other or the owner of the beasts, then how does that help the succession war?” Leorio asked. 

The mentor facade fell from Cheadle’s eyes, replaced by a familiar righteous fury that he’d seen on his own features. “They are using the nen beasts as weapons against everyone else, or to protect the princes. The main targets are the bodyguards of the others, of course.”

It made sense. If only one prince could survive and win, then the others still had to be eliminated. If they couldn’t be taken out by a rival prince’s beast, then their guards would be thinned out until an opportunity arose. It made so much sense that Leorio felt sick to his stomach.

Cheadle allowed the information to marinate, not ready to face the music herself. The small confines of her office was her only reprieve and Leorio was one of the few privy to the true emotions behind her mask. He trusted her not just because she backed him up in the election, not just because she had an unhealthy amount of faith in him, but because they had become friends. 

And Leorio’s trust in his friends remained unshakeable.

“How does that affect us from floors three to five?”

Cheadle sighed again. “We don’t know the extent of the beasts or their capabilities. Our eyes on the upper decks are working hard just to stay alive, so I would expect minimal communications.”

What that boiled down to was while the upper floors weren’t a hundred percent knowledgeable, the lower three decks would be swinging blind. Leorio thought back to the last time he spoke with Kurapika, too many things left unsaid. He thought of the only passage connecting the top two floors to the rest of the ship.

“On top of that nugget of good news, deck five is teeming with injuries and infections. There’s no doctor or facilities down there so anyone who wants to get treated has to try and make it up here.”

Leorio bristled. The mafia controlled access between floors, meaning that they could rob a sap blind or worse, just for trying to clear a head cold.

“Why the hell is there no doctor? If travel between decks is so hard then why is there no damn doctor down there?”

The final sigh elicited from Cheadle was all Leorio needed to know they were on the same page.

“Kakin can’t plan for shit?” She offered. “If the Hunter Association hadn’t joined then there wouldn’t even _be_ doctors below the second deck, I’m sure of that.”

“Can we do anything to help?”

Cheadle thought for a moment. “We might be able to petition the judicial system, but Mizai himself doesn’t know how well that would go over. Besides, we don’t have the time or manpower to spare.”

Leorio grinned with all his teeth. _A challenge, then._

“Well, lucky for those fuckers, my free time isn’t so free anyway.”

Cheadle looked as though she wanted to chide him on using his free time, meant for _sleeping_ , to petition courts and get travel access to the fifth deck, but she closed her mouth, fire still burning in her own tired eyes.

“Talk to Mizai, and if by some miracle you get approved, do _not_ let it affect what you do here.”

Leorio nodded, inheriting his mentor’s fire as he stalked out of the medical ward.

Mizai would be in the courtroom and Leorio’s stomach protested his altruism as he passed by the mess hall without a glance. The courtroom stood defiant on the third floor, with large creaking doors that announced Leorio’s arrival for him. Blissfully he hadn’t interrupted any real proceedings, and Mizai greeted him instantly.

“Leorio, what’s going on?” Mizai approached with an intrigued look.

The med student shifted under the eyes of the rest of the room. He was used to the Ox pulling information from him just by seeming genuinely interested. “I asked Cheadle this, but she said to talk to you instead. First, is it true that the fifth level doesn’t have any resident doctors?”

Mizai nodded, face stoic. “The Whale has only one-fifth the medical units as was planned, and one-fifteenth the number of doctors.”

Leorio scoffed. “But the guys upstairs probably have whole squads of medical care, huh?”

The anger had become a poisonous film on his tongue, because to him every death above and below the second deck was on the hands of the royalty. The worst part was that they knew it, and many didn’t care.

Mizai didn’t answer, but there was a familiar heat in his usually tame features as he absorbed Leorio’s words. 

“I wanted to know if I could go to the fifth floor to treat people. In my not-so-free time, of course.”

Leorio ran his hands through his hair as he waited for Mizai’s answer, aware that the entire courtroom was looking in. “I’m just trying to help people here, there’s got to be an exception somewhere. Look, Mizai. I’ve considered plenty of things, just listen. People are risking pissing off several mafia families just to try to get to a doctor, right? Even if they get their asses beat, or simply succumb to their illness, they still have to come to one of our units. Why not cut out the middleman, let me set up a clinic on the fifth deck, even if it’s just a trial?”

Leorio cleared his throat as another hunter hollered in agreement before being hushed by her friend. His cheeks felt hot, but Mizai contemplated what he’d just heard.

“It’s not quite as easy as strolling down there, Leorio.” 

“I know. I’ll do all the hokey-pokey, the paperwork. I’ll behave. And maybe it’ll take the stress off the other units in the long run.”

Mizai held up a finger and walked away to speak to one of the others in the room, a mousy looking man that blushed when Mizai bent down to speak to him. When Mizai came back the other guy pulled papers out of his bag and began writing. 

“I’ll put in the application for you. Just promise you’ll be careful?” 

“Of course. Thanks a million, Mizai.”

Leorio left the courtroom feeling somewhat successful and detoured by the mess hall to scarf down something hot before returning to the ward. He had intended to update Cheadle but she had been called into a surgery, so he left a note and a roll he confiscated from the mess hall on her desk. He made his way to his room with a yawn. 

Leorio unlocked the door with his key and turned on the lights when he entered. The room was small with a cot-like mattress in one corner and a desk in the other corner and a chest at the foot of the cot. By far not the worst place he’d ever slept. He shed his scrubs and stretched before collapsing, smacking his aching head into the wall with a whine.

He pressed his fingers into his eyes to erase the fuzziness and it wasn’t long before the ache in his head faded into a fitful dream.

**_but as I get older_ **

**_the chip on my shoulder is hard to hide_ **

**_and as I get older_ **

**_the child within me starts to die_ **

Kurapika’s charge was not who he expected them to be. 

At all. 

By his calculations he should have been the bodyguard of one of the older princes, ninth Prince Halkenburg for example, but instead he was faced with the youngest of princes and the lowest ranking of queens.

Kurapika thought he had made a foolish error, but Queen Oito, a calm woman with curly black hair bound at the nape of her neck, informed him that Halkenburg hadn’t put in an application for a bodyguard in the first place. Kurapika was impressed when she explained that she deduced why someone would try to be the bodyguard of Halkenburg, and decided that kind of person should be her daughter’s bodyguard.

Prince Halkenburg was the least likely to accept the succession war, someone who wouldn’t embrace it lightly. The queen had said, _“I needed someone who thought as you would, someone as cunning. I just wish to escape this war, for my daughter to escape.”_

Oito’s story of coming from an impoverished family and being swept up by the king and all of the luxuries of her married life did nothing to sway Kurapika, but her determination when she spoke of regret, of finding out what truly mattered in life. Of wanting to save her daughter, someone she loved, above all else.

Kurapika knew that feeling once upon a time ago. He still did, though he couldn’t quite show or acknowledge it.

As Kurapika held the youngest prince in his arms, Woble, he pledged to help with all of his strength as long as his conditions were met. He still had a job here. A _real_ one. Kurapika’s help didn’t often come for free anymore. He needed something of use, a contract, a condition, a payment.

Queen Oito agreed hesitantly, as his one condition did not come lightly. He needed to make contact with fourth Prince Tserriednich. As the lowest ranking wife she could do very little to make contact with the princes and wives of higher status, but there was a determination in her eyes when she promised to also do whatever she could to aid in his goal.

That determination was something Kurapika knew all too well.

When the day came to set sail, trouble began the moment they stepped foot on the vessel. Within moments of all the fourteenth prince’s bodyguards meeting, one of them was found dead slumped over a toilet. His body shriveled, drained of all blood. 

“Oh man, that's Woody.” Another bodyguard in the back exclaimed.

As they all searched the area, beasts flooded the room, circling the bodyguards and charges. Stunned, Kurapika tried to analyze the beasts while beating them back. He recognized that the beasts had been conjured by nen, but he could do very little as he remained close to the queen and prince. More bodyguards fell after Woody, but then beasts retreated as quickly as they had appeared. 

Kurapika dashed for the phone on the wall. All of the lines were recorded and watched by the royal guard, but none of that mattered. If there were nen beasts involved in the war, then shit had more or less hit the fan.

Kurapika hit the _broadcast_ button on the phone, which would make his announcement available to all of the ship, not just the top two floors. He announced that there were nen beasts and for every member of his crew to report their status to him.

One by one they answered that their areas were clear. Satisfied, Kurapika’s main concern became getting the queen and prince to safety. The bodyguards searched the queen’s quarters again, and two of the queen’s attendants quit on the spot.

That was the beginning of a very bad day for Kurapika. His eyes burned red as he confronted the other bodyguards, gun propped on the back of his right hand, unflinchingly prepared to shoot whomever the chain spun for.

“Tell me now, were any of you behind this attack?” Kurapika addressed the other guards, but confused faces peered back at him. All Kurapika found out was that he was the only person in the room who knew the bloody truth about the succession war. If these were bodyguards hired by Kakin, then they must have gone through Pariston, Kurapika’s predecessor as the Rat Zodiac.

That begged the question, _does Pariston not know about the succession war, or did he just let his soldiers go in blind?_

None of the bodyguards appeared to be lying, so Kurapika told them the truth in turn. Out of the bodyguards here, there was one that Kurapika had a gut feeling about. He hated when his gut told him things, because he much preferred to listen to his colder, more calculating head. 

Bill stood loosely at attention, eyes with heavy bags underneath focused on Kurapika. He had that same determination as Oito, as Gon, as Leorio. Even as Kurapika held a gun to them all and demanded answers, the queen trembling behind him, Bill’s composure never wavered. 

Bill admitted when the gun was on him that he assumed the youngest prince would be easy to guard and that his real mission started on the Dark Continent. Despite that, Kurapika recognized the burning shame in the other man's eyes as he swore to give his all to protect the queen and prince. All the while, Kurapika’s Dowsing Chain lay perfectly still.

“If I may,” Bill said. “I believe the jar ceremony at the beginning of the voyage must have bestowed a parasitic nen beast on one of the participants.”

“Do you know much about parasitic types, Bill?” Kurapika asked.

Bill nodded and continued to explain, only to be interrupted by a scream from behind them and they were faced with a dead bodyguard by the name of Kurton. Standing above him, the culprit was another bodyguard, Sayird, though he looked dazed, eyes unseeing.

Kurapika’s gut proved somewhat right when Bill wasted not even a second before his gun was aimed level between Sayird’s brows. 

“We should take him alive,” Kurapika said. No sooner than the words were out of his mouth, Bill’s aura became blazingly bright as he and Kurapika acted without words. It was easy to restrain Sayird, his movements jerky.

“Bill,” Kurapika panted. “How necessary is Sayird?”

Bill held his gun firm and steady. They had managed to get Sayird on the ground between them with little effort. “He’s not. Kurton’s ability would have transformed him into a boat that could fit several people.”

“And Sayird’s ability?”

Bill looked apprehensive. He glanced down at the restrained man with reluctance. Knowing someone's nen type or ability became an instant upper hand. “It's called Little Eye. He can control small insects. You could use it to spy on the other princes, perhaps.”

Kurapika shook his head. “We have to be wary of all consequences. Our priority is the safety of the queen and prince.”

Still, the ability would be helpful. Kurapika’s Steal Chain could take the ability of a nen user. He absorbed Sayird’s aura and put him in a faux Zetsu state. As he did, a small black parasitic figure disappeared from his shoulder and the man slumped, unconscious.

Bill had been right.

A gunshot sounded from the door, where one of Queen Oito's attendants, Sandra, lay dead. Striding over her body and into the room was a sturdy man wearing the uniform of first Prince Benjamin's soldiers. The assassin’s next attacks landed heavily, but Kurapika and Bill sprang into action, quickly developing a fighting pattern. 

Kurapika honed his abilities in a way that offered him powerful advantages. His thoughts raced back to his days of learning nen as he watched Bill block the assassin's bullets with his nen again, guarding not only himself but their charges as well. 

Izanuvi, his mentor, had encouraged him to leave a chain off, to keep one finger free. He also read Kurapika so flawlessly that Kurapika still thought about it, his former mentor’s words haunting him. For each finger, the ability made up for a weakness on another chain. To build power like that was akin to playing god.

Oito made eye contact with Kurapika as he checked over his shoulder, and wordlessly he asked, “Do you trust me?”

Her eyes were wide, yet determined. She looked scared to death and yearning to reach for her daughter, safe behind them all in the arms of Shimano, her remaining attendant.

Still, she pressed her quivering lips together and nodded firmly.

Kurapika bestowed Sayird’s ability on her with his Steal Chain and dodged an attack from the assassin. Bill had corralled him close enough that the two of them could pin him down with Kurapika on his legs and Bill knocking aside his gun. 

"Who do--hey!" Bill's attempt to question the assassin fell flat as he began foaming at the mouth and crumpled to the ground. He surged forward, trying to make him spit it out, stopped only by Kurapika’s warning. 

“It’s poison, Bill. Must have had it between his teeth.”

Bill panted, sweat dripping from his forehead as he cursed. “Damn.”

Oito gasped at the sight of the conjured, gold, bejeweled dolphin that had appeared beside her. Stealth Dolphin allowed Kurapika to know the name and effects of an ability he stole, and tallied up the total amount of time another ability had been active, Emperor Time.

Emperor Time was a dangerous state that allowed Kurapika to summon Stealth Dolphin and utilize a stolen nen ability. He could only activate Emperor Time if his eyes were red, and it would remain active until Sayird’s ability had been used up.

The only drawback was that for every second Emperor Time was active, Kurapika lost a year off his lifespan.

Kurapika didn't have time to explain anything at that exact moment as the phone began ringing and a knock sounded at the door. Shimano answered the phone and Bill made for the door with his gun in his hand.

“There’s a guard at the door, dressed exactly like the assassin.” Bill said.

"First Prince Benjamin, Third Prince Zhang Lei, Sixth Prince Tubeppa are all on the phone for Kurapika," Shimano informed the room.

The panic set in, though Kurapika couldn't allow himself to show it. He couldn’t deal with Emperor Time until he placated princes and possibly fended off another assassin. He’d be _fine._

“Bill, ask the guard for just a moment as we deal with the call, Shimano, connect me to the First Prince.” 

The attendant nodded and passed the phone to Kurapika but the voice greeting him belonged to Third Prince Zhang Lei, the other princes put on hold, and the guard still waiting at the door.

Zhang Lei requested an audience, during which Kurapika was expected to explain nen and nen abilities. He struggled to find the right words, knowing that a single misstep could cost him everything. However he and the third prince settled on a meeting and the conditions of such.

After the call ended, Kurapika turned on Shimano. “Why did you connect me to the third prince?”

Shimano had her long hair tied back, her plump cheeks accentuating her neutral expression. Despite his frustration, she spoke to Kurapika calmly. “The first Prince is cold and cruel. He would not be swayed by negotiations or pleas. Third Prince Zhang Lei can be reasoned with, but not if you didn’t show respect and answer immediately. And Prince Tubeppa would likely target the older princes while seeking mercy for the younger ones, but would never talk to us himself. An attendant can be kept waiting, a prince cannot.”

Kurapika nodded after a split second, the only reprieve he would get, and Bill answered the door. The guard introduced himself as Babimaina and seemed mostly indifferent to the fact that Kurapika had an audience with the third prince. He was indeed dressed in the same puffy green jacket that the assassin had worn and he requested to stay behind with Bill while the queen and prince accompanied Kurapika to the meeting.

Before leaving Kurapika whispered to Oito and gestured to Bill. The action seemed nondescript enough, and Babimaina—a tall man with coiled, coiffed hair, and a bored face, stood at attention in the center of the room. His eyes wandered around the room, carefully not looking in their direction.

Kurapika made a note to himself to watch Babimaina closely as he and his charges walked through the halls. 

Throughout the meeting with Zhang Lei Kurapika’s head began to pound. He had slipped contacts in before leaving to cover up crimson irises, but as long as he had to hold Emperor TIme, the hours dropped off of his lifespan. Even if he was far from his expiration date still, the pain increased with each use. 

In the end, he agreed to teach the bodyguards of any prince or queen, the basics of nen.

As Kurapika bid farewell to the prince, pressure began to build behind his eyes, making the contacts unbearable. They had yet to find an insect, meaning that close to three days had been stripped from him just from the meeting alone. He and the queen were accompanied by three new bodyguards, a sign of goodwill supposedly. One for Oito and Woble’s protection and two to participate in the nen lesson.

There was no point in totaling up how long Kurapika had his ability activated. He could almost taste the finish line in front of him. The last of the eyes. His own life didn’t matter in comparison to finish what he started. The anxiety of his timer ticking down was something Kurapika traded for the anxiety of simply not knowing how much time he had left. Stealth Dolphin could always tell him if he needed to know.

Kurapika ushered Oito back into her quarters. The tone of the room was nothing if not stiff as Bill and Babimaina faced each other in silent contemplation. When Kurapika entered, Bill turned his gaze from the other bodyguard.

“Welcome back. Nothing out of the ordinary here.”

Despite the blazing pain in his skull Kurapika nodded. He locked eyes with Bill to confirm that his ability was still active, that they still needed to find an insect _fast_.

Kurapika began his nen spiel for Zhang Lei’s bodyguards and Babimaina, who at the very least seemed to recognize it, judging by the flash in his eyes when Kurapika lied about his own nen type. He did it often, because it was easy to fool everyone when all they saw were chains. Technically it wasn’t a lie to call himself a Manipulator, but it wasn’t the truth either.

Babimaina reported back to Prince Benjamin, so Kurapika had to assume there were other nen users among his ranks. The scene of the succession war had become more convoluted as more unplanned factors surfaced. Likely, Babimaina had been surprised that Kurapika would offer such information lightly, but then again, he was supposed to be teaching absolute newbies.

Just as Kurapika felt a particularly painful stab at his skull, Queen Oito screamed. He had to do everything in his power not to flinch at the sound and act the attentive bodyguard part.

There, above the doorway to the next room, was a single cockroach. Kurapika caught the frantic look Oito and Bill shared as she screamed again, “Do _not_ kill that thing in here! Don’t you dare, take it away!”

Kurapika hated to see the woman play frail over a bug, but she knew what needed to be done as much as he did. As did Bill, as he cupped the insect delicately in his hands for Kurapika to assess. 

The bug would suffice, despite the attention it had drawn. 

Kurapika summoned Stealth Dolphin back, having dismissed it for the meeting with Zhang Lei.

Now that the queen had been equipped with the stolen ability, she could see and speak to the dolphin as well.

Kurapika allowed the dolphin to explain the situation to Oito in its robotic screech as he drew the room’s attention back to the cockroach. “How about a demonstration? Bill, care to step in?”

Bill nodded, facade unbreakable as the queen asked Shimano to hold the prince so she could lie down with a cool cloth over her face. Bill spoke to the group before him, yet projected his voice so every action would be clear to the queen as well. 

“I am going to make this bug move around the room with my nen.”

The bug began wobbling circles in the air as Oito attempted to grasp control. 

“As I command the bug to land on my palm, I have to make certain that my aura is steady so I don't overload the insect and kill it, but just enough that I can move it freely to my other palm.”

As Bill gave his commands, Oito then used her control over the bug to acquiesce. 

When the demonstration came to an end, Bill made a show of “disposing” the bug in another room so as not to upset the queen. Oito would take control of the bug then and use it to do recon on the other princes.

Bill and Kurapika entertained the other guards as the queen continued her mission. However, the mission didn’t last long as the queen screamed, ripping the towel from her face and dashing for Kurapika.

She pulled on the lapel of his suit as she screamed again. “Prince Momoze, she--that _monster--”_

Kurapika’s head began to feel like the ocean, waves lapping against the side of his skull with the tide. Well, if the waves were made of razors and the seafoam of acid.

“We can’t contact the prince’s room, unless--” Kurapika turned to Babimaina. As Benjamin’s guard he could act as the middleman and speak to a bodyguard.

Babimaina’s brows were pinched together, yet he agreed. Zhang Lei’s guards seemed irate that they had been lied to, but Babimaina only did as he was asked.

They confirmed that twelfth Prince Momoze had indeed been killed in her sleep. Hanzo, Momoze’s bodyguard spoke without inflection, an indication he as taking it hard. Kurapika could hear Bisky in the back. She was the bodyguard of thirteenth prince Marayam, the brother of Momoze. He had to trust the two of them to handle their own problems.

When the call ended, Zhang Lei’s guards had been appeased by Bill, who explained with as little dishonesty as he could, that the situation would become clear when the lessons started.

Kurapika watched as Babimaina approached the distraught queen, who sat on her bed, tears soaked into her round cheeks. Kurapika tried to mimic the motion but was unsure why his body didn’t want to listen to him. 

“Why?” Babimaina asked, his voice steady but loud enough for everyone to hear. It sounded like shattering ceramic to Kurapika’s ears. “Why would you scream out if you knew it would only give you away? No one would have ever known you were using nen if you didn’t draw that attention to yourself.” 

Kurapika tried to move again, to either comfort the queen or push Babimaina out of her space, but his limbs stiffened in place against his will.

Oito only regarded Babimaina with ice in her stare and said, “I am not the type of person to prioritize myself when someone else’s _child_ is being murdered. The fact that you even asked that question tells me all I need to know about you.”

With that the queen fell silent.

Babimaina tipped his head to the two other guards and exited to the main room, leaving the queen and Prince Woble with Shimano, Kurapika,and Bill. There was a distinctive lack of En in the queen’s private room as Babimaina left. En allowed a nen user to survey an area, the depth of what they could determine depended on their skill level.

Kurapika frowned and Bill gave him a look that said he’d noticed too. Bill joined him for which Kurapika was thankful because his body had yet to listen to him. 

“What do you think that was about?” Bill asked. His voice was low so as to not disturb the queen who had begun her own surveillance again. 

Kurapika had lost the meaning behind Bill's words. They sounded like daggers in his ears, and Shimano’s cooing lullaby sounded like a damaged record. His ears thrummed violently with the sound of his pulse and his throat closed up. His vision tunneled and Bill faded out of view until everything went silent and black.

* * *

The second day on the Black Whale started early with a full waiting room and a sealed envelope from Mizai. Inside was a temporary clearance tag for Leorio’s ID badge and the signed documentation he needed to verify it. It read: _...temporary clearance granted for Leorio Paladiknight, passenger number 74857, deck three (3) origin, medical ward resident, room number 1348; on the grounds of additional medical care and assistance for the fifth deck. Clearance is valid for three (3) days and is renewable pending further application process. Martial Law remains in effect through the passages between decks. Any violations will result in imprisonment, interrogation, and/or death._

Leorio had gotten what he wanted and his day passed quickly, despite exceeding his scheduled shift. Cheadle set aside a crate of supplies for him to take and voiced her approval before being whisked away to another task. 

After Leorio managed to escape from the medical ward he stopped by his room to get his things settled. He affixed his temporary clearance tag and crisply folded his documentation and put it in his briefcase. He straightened his scrubs and gathered his supplies and made his way to the passage between the third and fourth floors, slipping into Zetsu as he left his room. 

Mizai waited for him there and waved him off to the side. 

“Just wanted to give you some advice. You remember that these lower floors are controlled by the mafia right?”

“Yep.”

Mizai nodded. “Follow the orders of your documentation and be respectful and don’t start shit and you should be fine. Fifth floor is where I have the least knowledge, so keep an eye out for me.”

Mizai waved with a polite smile to the woman inside the passage gatehouse, which was a lot more like a miniature fortress. Leorio had to cross through there and be escorted to the other side, where he just had to follow signs for the next floor.

It seemed easy enough, but Leorio’s palms sweated. He walked up to the gatehouse and leveraged his crate onto his hip in order to swipe his tag and open the door. One anxiety vanquished. If the clearance didn’t work, he shouldn’t have been able to get through the sealed metal door.

The girl inside the gatehouse seemed bored and instructed Leorio to lay his crate and briefcase on the table. She removed the lid to the crate and examined the contents. There were a few packaged needles and vials of antibiotic and insulin, bandages, packaged needles and stitching, thread, general painkillers and pain relief. She moved on to the briefcase, face never displaying what she was thinking. Inside the briefcase she rifled through even more medical supplies, Leorio’s deodorant and stray change. She looked over his documentation last and then leaned against the table.

“Can I take this? I need it for the vending machine.” She pointed beside her. Leorio nodded even though _he_ needed it for the vending machine in the cafeteria. 

The girl grabbed her snack and walked Leorio to the opposite door, allowing him to go on his way. The next gatehouse was a lot like the first one, except with more guns and less cute girls asking for change. 

Leorio’s documentation was triple checked by three different people in bulletproof vests and it was a fifteen minute wait before he was finally allowed to go through to the fifth floor. His documentation allowed him to _“make use of an existing facility, not to override the previous function of the facility and follow all protocol of existing facility.”_

Leorio figured the best way to get the job done would be to set up in the cafeteria. As he entered, he sensed the true nature of the residents of the fifth floor. While there were minor criminals, soldiers, or simply the impoverished, something more sinister lurked. Leorio’s spit soured in his mouth as he felt the intense pressure from the other nen he felt in the room.

Morel had cautioned him prior to the voyage that Zetsu was essential. If he slipped into Zetsu and the enemy had already noticed him, they would be alerted. After sensing the aura in the room, Leorio was glad he’d paid attention for once. Despite his inexperience, Leorio caught on quick and he had great teachers.

Leorio found a table that had a lone guy at it, and set his crate down. The guy looked up through his boyish bangs and Leorio could see a rose tattoo high on his neck. 

“Sorry, can I set up here? I won’t be in the way.”

The rose-guy hummed. “Not my table anyway. Do what ya want.”

Leorio nodded and began laying out his supplies. “Know anyone that needs a doctor?” he asked conversationally.

“A doctor?” The guy looked back up at him and analyzed the table with narrow eyes. “I’ll be back.”

The guy returned quickly with a few people, some also with rose tattoos. “We can’t pay, but these idiots got banged up and won’t stop moaning about it.”

By the way some of them were looking at the guy, Leorio thought that maybe he had been the one to bang them up, but he held his tongue. He had to mind his manners, here.

“I’m not charging anything, I just came here to help.”

Leorio donned a mask and began working on sealing and sanitizing wounds. Even if the wounds weren’t bad, if left to fester whole limbs could be lost to infection. Leorio fixed up plenty of beat up guys and soon a line formed. 

“I have clearance for three days, so I’ll be coming back as long as that isn’t an imposition.” Leorio spoke to the guy who had given him the table. He chose to sit beside Leorio as he worked, looking bored and adding commentary. When the next patient stepped up, he looked apprehensively at the man.

With a slight nod, the other man acknowledged him and the tension eased a fraction. “Relax buddy, the nice doctor man don’t bite. Do ya?”

Leorio laughed. “Only if you ask nicely.”

The man joined him in a chuckle, but the patient sat as still as a monument. Leorio collected the unintentional hint. Morel taught him that even the most trained person could tell you a lot by how they acted. Body language was something that was nearly untrainable. 

Many of the patients bowed to the rose tattooed guy after their session. Many seemed afraid of him. Several of his own people, judging by the matching tattoos.

It clicked that he must be a member of the Char- R, the mafia family that controlled the fifth floor.

Leorio’s line dwindled and a pack of rose tattooed guys came to the table. They glanced first at the man beside him, then thanked Leorio for his care. Then said if he came back the next two days they would be prepared for him.

Though they were powerful, the dark nen that Leorio had sensed didn't come from them. No, the dark nen hadn’t moved since Leorio arrived, as if it lay in wait.

The guy beside him watched him pack up the remains of his supplies as he prepared to head back. “We haven’t properly been introduced. I’m Sun-Bin.”

The man didn’t offer his hand so Leorio continued to pack. “Leorio.”

“Well, Leorio. Keep an eye out on the home floor for me, yeah? It would be in your best interest.”

Sun-Bin walked away, leaving Leorio to ponder the threat he posed.

.

As Leorio made to exit the cafeteria, someone bumped into him and his briefcase skittered across the floor. Leorio bent to pick it up when someone else bumped him from the back and he landed on his ass next to his briefcase. 

He got up and brushed himself off, careful not to make any sort of scene. In the crowd of the cafeteria he couldn’t determine who had pushed him and whether or not it was purposeful, so he let it go. 

Leorio made it back through the gates with relative ease, though he noticed the guard at the last gate changed from the girl to some nondescript guy with dull brown hair and a long nose who wrote something down before waving him off without looking him in the eyes.

When Leorio got back to his room he found it turned upside down with his things scattered everywhere. Leorio dropped his briefcase and pulled out his trusty pocket knife and began rummaging through the wreckage of his room. He wasn’t looking for expensive medical books or his watch or even an intruder, but a small scrap of paper. He crawled under the bed to find it flung under there with the other contents of his drawers.

Leorio retrieved the paper and held it close as he sat on the floor of his room with his back to the wall. The disaster didn’t make sense. Nothing had been missing, so whoever had fucked up his room hadn’t found what they were looking for. 

Fragile photograph in one hand, knife in the other, Leorio began shuffling through the mess at his feet. He groaned, trying to figure out what he'd say to Cheadle and Mizai about it.

* * *

_Kurapika was dressed in his traditional clothes, facing the setting sun. Blue sky gave way to brilliant oranges and pinks and purples, a light wind breathed on his face. The scene before him was beautiful, a valley in the midst of mountains, a small settlement alive in the setting light. He wasn’t in Lasko, this wasn’t a memory from his past._

_The grass rustled behind Kurapika, but he didn’t turn. He didn’t feel the need to, because the person walking to his side wasn’t a stranger._

_The wind carried the scent of an old, cheap cologne and antiseptic soap. Kurapika didn’t need to turn to know who that scent belonged to. Leorio whistled. “That’s a nice view. Sure would like to stay a while.”_

_Kurapika tried to answer, but the voice that belonged to him submitted to the voice of someone he didn’t know. Kurapika wanted to say that he enjoyed the cool wind, but what came out of his lips was, “There’s more I have left to do, I can’t stay anywhere.”_

_Leorio sighed, but there was a whisper of a smile on his face. Kurapika saw that his friend’s face had aged, and his dumb shades were replaced with a sensible pair of wire framed glasses. There were soft lines in the corners of his eyes, as if all he did was laugh._

_“You’re done, Kurapika. You’re finally done, just accept it.”_

_Not-Kurapika hardly considered Leorio’s words, gazed turned toward the valley. The sunset began to bleed, red dominating the beauty. The fires of the bustling settlement burned higher until the scene before them turned crimson. All Kurapika could see was red, but he was seeing through Not-Kurapika’s eyes._

_Silently Kurapika begged to turn around, to see Leorio again and to stop watching the massacre before him. The bloodsoaked sky formed daggers to pierce the burning settlers below, splashing the ground like a crime scene._

_“If it doesn’t stop when you’re done, then are you even Kurapika anymore?”_

_Slowly, Not-Kurapika turned to watch Leorio. It was a relief from the scene in the valley, but Leorio was drenched in blood himself._

_“If you’re dead and you’re not done, what was the point of it all anyway?”_

_Leorio had taken a hit from the blood rain, but why was it coming out of his mouth?_

_Leorio dropped to his knees and reached out, hand solid under all of his blood. “I’ll wait for you, okay? Until you’re Kurapika again, the real Kurapika, my Kurapika, I’ll wait.”_

_Kurapika tried to scream, but the blood rain pelted Leorio’s body, riddling him with wounds and covering him in blood._

_The world had become red and Kurapika raged inside his own body until the blood rose up and swallowed the valley whole._

Kurapika woke from the nightmare to see Bill beside him. Queen Oito grumbled from her bed and Shimano let out a small gasp. Kurapika wiped sweat from his brow.

“Finally,” Bill sighed. The room was devoid of anyone else. “I didn’t dare call a doctor, but if you had been out much longer I wouldn't have had a choice.”

Kurapika stood to address Oito, but she raised her hand to stop him. Her eyes looked pained with dark circles underneath, her curly black hair a wild mess as Shimano attempted to tame it.

“I’ll continue,” she croaked.

Kurapika realized she must have felt his pain as well with shame. He glanced at the clock on the wall and nearly panicked when he realized Emperor Time had been active for twelve hours. “I’m sorry, my ability has a limit. We should start with the higher princes.” Oito stared at him with blank eyes.

“Why?” She asked. “To get closer to your goal?”

Kurapika shook his head, unoffended by her words. “They’re the ones with the most power. We need to know how many of them can use nen and what their abilities are.” 

Babimaina knocked once before entering. Oito scribbled in her journal as Babimaina greeted Bill and Kurapika before allowing the other bodyguards back in. They talked amongst themselves for a few minutes before Kurapika felt nauseous at the pressure of Emperor Time dissipating. He dismissed the dolphin at his side, not wanting to know how much time he’d collected.

Oito startled as the ability ended and Babimaina’s eyes darted to her. No doubt he had already figured out Oito was using nen. Kurapika didn’t know what his goal was in releasing his En yesterday, but it was back today.

Oito looked to Kurapika, with a small shake of her head, as though clearing her own headache away. He felt a spike of anger rise, and he closed his eyes, focusing on keeping his eyes from turning back to red. His anger didn’t have Oito’s name on it, but his own. If he had been stronger they could have gotten more information the night before.

Now that he knew how bad his own condition affected her, he’d have to be conscious of his ability hurting someone other than himself. Especially the very person he’d sworn to protect.

Bodyguards from princes two through six showed up for the lesson around ten, and Kurapika stood at the front of the main room, Oito and Woble remaining in the room behind him. There was a very clear line on the floor that none of the bodyguards were meant to cross.

Kurapika began the lesson by asking who had heard of nen and assigning them duties to correct him if needed or help others. Kurapika stated that all of his rules must be met or else they wouldn’t be able to learn nen within the given two weeks. 

Babimaina took his new title of watcher seriously, eyes trailing Kurapika across the room.

One of the guards focused on the back of the room and when Kurapika called for her attention, she asked about the woman in the back of the room. Kurapika squinted his eyes, but the assassin chose not to reveal themselves to the group. The woman who had asked the question dropped dead, body shriveled like Woody and the others.

Kurapika and Bill couldn’t dispatch them before they disappeared from the room and Kurapika tried to regain control of the room. After a moment the guards quieted down enough for Kurapika to explain that their bodyguards had been dropping like flies, but especially those without nen.

“We wouldn’t attack our own guards, let alone others. These lessons are important because we have reason to believe that individuals without nen are being targeted.”

The room agreed after a moment, one guard being a voice of reason amongst the others. Belerainte was a tall man, who had just watched his partner fall in the attack. He offered a small smile to Kurapika as he began the lesson again. 

As Kurapika walked through the room he thought of all of his friends, and for once it didn’t hurt. He pictured Gon’s eyes as he coached the group, Killua’s attitude every time he passed the guy who stepped over the line, Leorio’s companionship as he shared an amused look with Bill. 

There was a saying, that one’s life flashed before their eyes before their death. Kurapika wondered if since his death rapidly approached, his remaining days would be filled with longing for familiar scents and smiles. He thought of his clan, his family, of stolen eyes and lives, and his resolve hardened, even as he thought of Kurta clothes and a reliable briefcase.

Even as he walked among a sea of people who would kill him without hesitation.

* * *

On the last day of Leorio’s clearance, his trip to the fifth tier started at five in the morning and ended just past seven thirty. He had come off the late shift in the medical ward and just wanted to get it over with so he could sleep for a solid eight hours before his next shift.

Mizai accompanied him, having heard about what happened on the fifth floor. Leorio had explained about the bloodlust and sinister nen on the fifth floor, about the Char-R and their rose tattoos, and Sun-Bin who asked him to search for Hisoka.

Back then Mizai couldn’t give him an answer when he asked why the Char-R would be hunting Hisoka, but before they left the courtroom that morning Mizai told him they had to talk after the clinic.

Currently, they had passed the gatehouse for the third tier on their way back. Mizai nodded to the gatehouse guard and they entered home territory.

Mizai turned the corner to head back to the medical ward, but stopped just outside the sight of the gatehouse. Very few people wandered the third floor before nine, so no one would overhear them in the hall unless they were obvious about it. 

“The Phantom Troupe are on the ship,” Mizai whispered.

Leorio attempted to school his expression, but he wasn’t sure if his incredulous anger was hidden well enough.

Judging by Mizai’s placating expression, it was not. “They’re looking for Hisoka, just like the Char-R.”

Leorio cursed and ran a hand through his hair and then cursed again for emphasis. “Shit. The mafia and the Phantom Troupe? Really?”

Mizai had noticeable circles underneath his eyes. Leorio knew he had one of the harder jobs on the voyage as not many people could hold their composure as well as he did, but now that his strain had become apparent; it made Leorio feel even weaker for trying to run away to his scratchy mattress.

“They’re also attempting to get to the top floors, but their priority seems to be Hisoka. What did Sun-Bin say to you when he pulled you aside before we left?”

“That if my clearance doesn’t get approved again, he knows who to put _the pressure on_.”

Mizai closed his eyes as if it would help him rationalize the series of events. “That way he keeps neutral eyes on the third floor and anything you see in between floors. I’ll get your application resubmitted as soon as we leave here.”

Leorio nodded, bewildered that his life had become this, but he’d asked for it, really.

“There’s something I wanted your opinion on,” Mizai said. “I need to know whether or not to inform our Rat.”

Leorio knew that Kurapika wanted to see the Phantom Troupe brought to heel as much as he wanted to recover the eyes, but with Kurapika on a razor’s edge, the information about the Phantom Troupe might distract him from the task on hand.

Besides, the passage between the second and third floors would remain closed unless the situation on the boat became dire. Kurapika wouldn’t be able to get to the fifth floor from the upper decks unless he compromised the entire ship. And as long as the Phantom Troupe were looking for Hisoka on the lower levels then they could stay separated.

Nevermind the bully of a voice in Leorio’s head that told him if he couldn’t handle the Phantom Troupe, then he had no hope of becoming Kurapika’s equal.

Mizai waited for an answer, observing the catastrophe of emotions that warred on Leorio’s face.

“No, don’t tell him,” Leorio said after a minute. “For now he can’t get to them and they can’t get to him. If they’re looking for Hisoka then maybe they don’t even know he’s on board. If he gets mad that he didn’t know then we’ll blame me.”

Mizai frowned but nodded. “Be careful, Leorio. Char-R would have found Hisoka if he was on the fifth floor, which gives us a fifty-fifty chance he’s on this one.”

Leorio saluted and Mizai turned the opposite direction to head back to the courtroom. Leorio stopped by the cafeteria to get a cup of coffee on his way back to the medical ward to report to Cheadle. He noticed that the calm waiting room he left had stayed that way. That meant Cheadle had likely retired to the office to look over paperwork.

Sure enough, that was where Leorio found her, hands curled around her own coffee. 

“Knock knock, boss. Came to tell you about the trip.”

Cheadle waved him on as she made marks on her papers. He explained the trip itself briefly, the medical work he did and such, but he also told her about Sun-Bin and what Mizai told her.

She pinched her nose, the gesture pushing her glasses up. “Of course the Phantom Troupe is here. In any case, I think it’s a wise idea not to tell our Rat. He’s in a precarious situation up top. If he knew about this it would only further split his attention. We’ll do what we can about the Phantom Troupe, they’re in our domain after all.”

A wave of relief washed over Leorio. Mizai had asked his opinion and Cheadle approved the decision. Slowly but surely, Leorio managed to push out his inner voice and replace it with the warm faith and trust of his teammates.

“I don’t like how this Sun-Bin character is attached to you.” Cheadle regarded him with a careful look.

Sun-Bin had been at the cafeteria for every one of Leorio’s clinics. He always set up a chair beside the table and watched with minimal interruptions. He spoke informally, indicating that either he didn’t give a shit about manners or that no one he spoke to was above him in rank. It could be a combination of both, but Leorio preferred to remain cautious. If there was a bigger bad than Sun-Bin, he didn’t want to meet them.

“I wouldn’t say _attached,_ but he just wants information from up here. We’ve already talked about what I’ll say and how he’s responded.”

“I know, but I can’t help but feel it's indicative of something else brewing inside Char-R’s ranks.”

Gel entered to check in for her shift, raising her eyebrows when she saw Leorio. “Morning, Cheadle. Can I see the roster for a moment?”

With Cheadle distracted, Gel shooed Leorio away with her hands, signaling that he needed to run, if he wanted to get any rest. Leorio winked at her in gratitude before scuttling out of the office.

Leorio’s room was located just outside of the medical ward. The corridors of the third tier were and lit only by lighted strips along the floor and ceiling. Leorio’s En probed ahead of him, feeble but there nonetheless. He sensed something was off by the time he reached his door but the fraction of a second that he delayed using his Gyo was all it took. By the time he opened the door he felt more than saw something razor sharp hit the wall grazing his cheek and drawing blood.

The room before him was completely dark, but by activating his Gyo he could tell he was no longer alone. Shrouded by an immensely powerful In, an advanced version of Zetsu, was the last person Leorio wanted to see.

From inside the darkness of the room came another razor sharp object that Leorio barely deflected with his switchblade. He received another, smaller, nick to his face.

“Well, well, well. You may be a naughty boy but you’ve learned some tricks. You’ve also caused quite a bit of trouble for the both of us, so I think you should indulge me in a little game as repayment.”

Leorio edged into the room and pushed his back against the light switch against the wall. “And if I’m not interested, Hisoka?”

Hisoka’s style had been toned down, dressed in a dull green uniform, reminiscent of what Leorio had seen the gate guards wearing. His teal hair lay limp in front of his eyes, another card in each hand between his index and middle fingers.

“Oh, but you _really_ should be interested. I’m not here for you at all. You see, Chrollo and I are playing a little game. A game where I kill all his little spiders and they pretend like they can stop me. As long as I can play my game, then the Phantom Troupe is occupied until they go bye-bye.”

Leorio squinted at the clown, who laughed sickeningly. “How many casualties is your game going to have, huh? And what does any of this have to do with me?”

Leorio didn’t care why Hisoka had beef with the Phantom Troupe, but the more information he had the better. 

Hisoka rolled his eyes. “Because we can help each other, isn’t that grand?”

“How so?”

“Well, for an appetizer, you seem rather cozy with the mafia of the fifth floor. Rumor has it they’re going to double cross my ex troupe _and_ that they have a passage to the first floor. Doesn’t that sound delicious?”

A siren broke the tense starting contest the two had been in, and Leorio could hear it echo throughout the hall. A staticky voice reported over the intercom, “The third tier is on lockdown; repeat third tier on lockdown. Soldiers will scour the halls, rooms, and be checking ID. Anyone found without ID will be interrogated and arrested. We are looking for an armed and dangerous individual responsible for the homicide of twenty people.”

Leorio’s head snapped back to Hisoka, but before he could say anything, Hisoka laughed. “What? It wasn’t me. I’m here with you after all, right?”

The clown winked and pulled a dull brown wig from the inside the coat of his uniform.

Leorio scoffed. “I'm not going to work with you, you’re just as bad as the Phantom Troupe.”

Hisoka seemed unbothered as he arranged the wig on his head, tucking teal strands underneath. When he met Leorio’s eyes again, the clown seemed like an average gate guard. 

Hisoka’s eyes still burned gold with malice. “Perhaps, but do you think they conveniently forgot their vendetta against a certain _chain user?”_

Just the phrase _chain user_ sent Leorio back to the last time he had helped Kurapika. How his friend had to get to his breaking point before he caved and let his friends help him. Even then, he’d worked himself into a fevered coma that Leorio and Melody had graciously nursed him through. Their partingin Yorknew had seemed hopeful at the time, but in retrospect Leorio wished he had run after Kurapika.

“That was easy.” Hisoka giggled and brought Leorio back to the present. “See, if I’m actively killing off the Troupe, then they will be focused on me, and _if_ they survive, our tasty little blond won't be their priority.”

“Unless the Troupe kills _you_ ,” Leorio countered. “There’s several of them and one of you.”

Hisoka’s grin sharpened, eyes hooded. If anything, the skewed odds probably only heightened his enjoyment. The alarms still blared around them and it would only a matter of time until a soldier came and found Hisoka. Leorio only had to stall for a while longer, but he had a feeling the magician had a trick up his sleeve.

Hisoka moved closer and leaned in, his breath as sharp as his cards on Leorio’s neck. “Way to be a pessimist.”

Hisoka leveled his gold gaze with Leorio’s, only a few inches shorter than the medical student. “Here’s how the game’s played, when you go back to the fifth level you will say that you suspect someone on the third floor, but that they are being elusive. Char-R will be intrigued.”

There came a knock at the door and Hisoka called, “Come in!”

Leorio furrowed his brows in confusion. A soldier stepped in and his face slipped into recognition at the sight of Hisoka. “Where have you been? We’re supposed to be paired up, I can’t keep covering for you.”

Hisoka winked and blew the guard a kiss. “Relax, I was escorting the nice doctor to his room when the alarm went off.”

The soldier looked Leorio up and down, noting his scrubs. “Doctor?”

“Medical student, sir.”

“Regardless, you should get to the medical ward. They're gonna need some help, it’s ugly.”

Hisoka flashed Leorio a “call me” sign and the soldier next to him laughed. Clearly Hisoka’s disguise wouldn’t be undone so easily so Leorio made no move to out him to the soldier and watched them disappear before he started to move. 

Leorio had no idea where to begin his report to Cheadle and Mizai so he spent his short walk to the medical ward analyzing his interaction with Hisoka. The trails of blood leading into the medical ward were hard to miss and the waiting room had become frenzied in the half hour Leorio had been gone.

A doctor passed Leorio a clipboard before running out of the ward. Weary, confused, and preoccupied, Leorio set to work with none of his usual complaints. He wouldn’t seek out Cheadle in the moment, knowing their paths would cross at some point in the ward. For now, there were casualties that needed identifying and wounded that needed treating and witnesses that needed questioning and staff that needed relief.

* * *

After the death of Prince Momoze, the upper floors became even more unbearably tense. Hanzo, who had been guarding her, took it personally and as a result attempted to find and apprehend the culprit.

The next morning, Vergei, a posh, uptight bodyguard of Prince Marayam, had called that morning to dictate a message from Hanzo. The entirety of room 1013 was sealed with nen. The occupants could leave, such as the bodyguard Belerainte who was sent to learn nen, but they couldn't re-enter or be seen by anyone outside the room.

Kurapika explained that it was more likely that Prince Marayam’s nen beast teleported the inhabitants of room 1013 to a secondary, sealed, nen summoned location. They were no longer in room 1013 although that is how it appeared.

When Belerainte entered for the lesson that morning, he flashed Kurapika a pleasant smile, seemingly undeterred by not being able to go back to his room or charge.

The lesson had yet to commence as someone insisted on using the restroom. Muhan, a bodyguard from the very man Kurapika was after. He had yet to extract any information from the guard, lest he draw undue attention to the queen and prince.

“Someone check on Muhan, we need to get started.”

Bill moved from his place beside Kurapika and when he came back he shook his head. “We’ve been attacked again.”

At that, the room exploded with accusations against Kurapika and Bill specifically, but against the entirety of Prince Woble’s entourage.

Belerainte cleared his throat. As a tall man he easily commanded the room with placating gestures. “First of all, who even goes to the bathroom in enemy territory, huh? An idiot, that’s who. Second--” A few guards grumbled at that and Belerainte allowed them to finish. “Second, it’s been confirmed that people who don’t know nen are being taken out. Why would Kurapika want to teach us nen if people without it are being attacked?”

The room was nearly silent, though a few guards had something to mumble about _easy pickings_.

Belerainte continued. “My partner, the other guy who was supposed to be taking this lesson with me, died in the attack yesterday. A lot more people are going to die if we sit back and do nothing.

“Don't you think this war is also about the guards and who can remain standing the longest? I'm not interested in a promotion and as a hunter I will simply move on to my next job after this, but if the lessons end, the bad guy wins for real.”

The mumbling quieted down to nothing. 

“If any of you want to quit you should be graceful do it without interrupting next time.”

When the attention of the room turned back to Kurapika, he instructed Bill to run the guards through more exercises as he claimed to observe. He walked around the room answering questions until he found the man he wanted to speak to.

“Belerainte, can we talk?”

Belerainte pointed to himself comically before walking up to the line, where he waited respectfully for Kurapika to join him.

“Is this okay? They might start about you picking favorite students now.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Kurapika said. Belerainte was a hunter, meaning there was a certain level of unspoken communication between them. When he introduced himself on the first day, Kurapika’s gut reacted to the other man saying he just wanted to save lives.

Kurapika sighed as he realized another altruistic, idealistic, companion could compromise the thin, cracking ice that kept others at bay. However, in a sea of killers, altruism was the only thing Kurapika could count on if he wanted reliability from those he worked with.

Kurapika made a small sign with his nen, Belerainte’s body blocking it from the view of the rest of the room. 

_NEED TO TALK. NOT HERE._

Belerainte nodded. “Can I borrow Bill for ten minutes? I want to show him room 1013 and get his opinion on how to proceed.”

“Of course.”

Belerainte moved towards the door, but stopped for a moment. The kindness in his eyes did not go unnoticed as another crack formed in Kurapika’s walls. “No matter what happens, keep up the lessons and save as many princes as you can.” 

Kurapika turned back to the room and picked up the lesson where Bill left off. None of the guards appeared to be outwardly suspicious of Belerainte and Bill leaving together, but Babimaina’s eyes tracked Kurapika across the room.

Even the moment of sympathy and compassion Babimaina showed to Oito wove a thread of doubt in Kurapika’s assessments. If he faltered, if he showed weakness, if he trusted the wrong person, Kurapika’s life and goal might as well end on the Whale. He had prepared for that opportunity, but the more it loomed over him, the stronger his resolve had become.

Kurapika would finish what the Phantom Troupe started, and at last the souls of the Kurta could rest. Their spilt blood could return to the scorched earth of their land instead of haunting the last of their clan and Kurapika would have his vengeance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual comments, kudos, bookmarks, screaming, and keysmashing are alway welcome!
> 
> Songs to denote the first two POV changes are:  
> Rough - VIAL  
> Very Long List - Northbound
> 
> You can find my [ leopika playlist here! ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=3QTHgJkfR2KXWdfd5OZbyw)

**Author's Note:**

> constructive criticism, keysmashes, and comments are ALWAYS appreciated.  
> the underlined, bold, and italics bits to denote POV changes are song lyrics!  
> All I Wanted - Paramore  
> Jet Black Heart - 5SOS  
> you can find my [leopika playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7EjxYawYlruH7brXEIvOPX?si=pcZAZ7FJTJyVgTU3f79cFQ)here!


End file.
